And now, a rant.

Okay. Forgive me while I get up on my soapbox for a moment here.

Is it just me, or are more and more people getting really intolerant of completely stupid things these days?

There's a lot of really bad, immoral stuff going on in our world today (none of which will be discussed here). And for the majority of it, I am told that I need to put up with it all or else I am a terrible and judgmental person, the quintessential holier-than-thou, intolerant Christian. And whether I agree with it or not, I try my best to follow these new social norms and not express my disapproval.

But mention that you don't breastfeed and then watch the judgments come pouring down over you.

In the last month, I have read a blog post that explained to me that if I had my son circumcised, it was because I thought he was born deformed. A friend of mine mentioned that she attended a book club only to be told by one of its members that all fiction was "worthless." Another blog post told me that if I was just brave and open-minded enough, I should be able to really enjoy a terribly crass and vulgar Broadway show that mocks my religion (the blog post didn't explain what I should do if I simply hate vulgarity-- apparently that's my own problem to work through). A facebook post told me that if I didn't keep my baby in a rear-facing carseat until he was two years old, it's because I was more worried about my time than my baby's safety and clearly did not deserve to be a parent at all. I'm also a bad parent for preferring the sleep training tactics in the book On Becoming Babywise to Dr. Sears' ideas of attachment parenting in The Baby Book. And while I'm discussing my parenting flaws, I've also learned that I'm a prude who is embarrassed of my body since I like to cover up while nursing, and don't bother to post pictures (or even take them, for that matter) on facebook of the tender moment.

And here is my big problem with all this: WHY DO YOU CARE? Of all the important things that need to be changed in the world, you're going to spend all your time campaigning for that? Really? At least when I was a missionary and trying to change people, I was trying to save their souls. Not their foreskins. Unless I'm endangering myself or my children (physically or emotionally), I don't think you need to make it your life's work to change me. Go spend that energy volunteering for the Red Cross or something.

Maybe you only like to read self-help books. That's great! Good for you! But don't tell me that the books I enjoy are worthless. Just because you don't value them doesn't mean they don't have value. (And in return, I will try my hardest to not tell you that I would rather die than read most self-help books...)

Maybe you think circumcision is a miserable, barbarian custom that needs to be done away with. Fine. But that doesn't mean you need to make it your life goal to tell me I'm a bad person for choosing that option. Really. You don't need to do that. Because I'm pretty sure that in the long run, it doesn't matter.

Maybe you are convinced that more women need to give birth naturally. That may be true. But telling someone who just had a c-section that the only reason for her surgery was because her doctor is a greedy pig isn't helping her. It's just making her feel bad. And no brand new mother needs you to make her feel bad. Rather than doing that, try bringing her a casserole instead. THAT'S something she could probably use! (I'm weird here, because I have given birth naturally and I loved it, but the people who run around trying to tell everyone else they should do it too drive me bonkers. I sort of hate putting myself in their camp!)

I have several friends who have not been able to nurse their babies (all for different reasons). Please don't tell them that breastmilk is better than formula for their babies. When they begin mixing up formula for their baby, don't stare at them in horror and tell them you "thought" they were good mothers until now (true story). Don't tell them that the reason people don't breastfeed is simply because they're too lazy to get up in the middle of the night (another true story). Every single one of these people tried breastfeeding and it didn't work. Breastmilk is no longer an option! Which means what she has left to try is formula or letting her child starve! Do you really think formula is worse than starvation? And honestly, even if they didn't attempt to breastfeed at all, it's still none of your business! Nearly an entire generation of women refused to breastfeed their kids and nothing worse than allergies has ever been linked to that movement. Heck, I have allergies and I was breastfed! Really. If the worst thing we, as mothers, ever do to our children is feeding them formula, I think we should all be given medals.

And while I'm ranting about nursing, I have to also say that if you don't want to wear a cover while you nurse your baby, that's fine. While I know plenty of people who are uncomfortable with that, I don't happen to be one of them, so I don't particularly care. But don't tell me about your lack of a cover as though this makes you a better mother than me. It doesn't. I'm certain that being covered while eating has absolutely no bearing whatsoever on whether or not your child or mine will be accepted to Harvard some day.


All right. I need to stop and let my blood pressure drop back down into a healthy range again.

I realize I'm mostly focusing on parenting stuff. I also realize that I'm beginning to sound like a loony and that none of you who read my blog are guilty of this. But this was the only place I could think of to get this out of my system.

So my final plea:

If you feel strongly about something, I'm fine with you explaining your views to me. I'll probably even be genuinely interested to hear your take on things. I like learning new stuff. But when you just attack me for not seeing things the way you do, it doesn't help your cause at all. It just leads to me stubbornly digging in my heels against your cause, possibly being offended, and even more possibly not liking you very much any more.

Is that really what you're trying to accomplish?

Let's try to be tolerant of the little things in life that don't matter. Because the truth is, most of them really don't matter that much.

Starting My Bucket List

Am I crazy for kind of wanting to see a real live tornado some day?

I also want to see the Northern Lights. I know those aren't nearly as scary, but keep in mind that I have a full-on fear of cold, so those might be as inaccessible to me as my other dream of seeing a blue whale and a great white shark. But not together.

Some day...

Allergies

Last spring, when I was pregnant with Ryder, I took claritin (or whatever the generic version of that is called) for my allergies. I know lots of people who refuse to take any medications while pregnant, and I felt sort of guilty for indulging myself, but I thought it was necessary for my sanity. Recently, I've been remembering all this and the guilt was washing over me again. Were the drugs really necessary? Was I just being my typical wimpy-when-sick self? Maybe I should have just gritted my teeth and pushed through it all, sans drugs. Maybe it was all in my head.

That's what I'd been wondering.

Until yesterday.

When I laid on the couch for an hour with a cold washcloth over my eyes. And I showered and scrubbed my eyes clean. Twice. And I didn't wear mascara (gasp!). And I took my claritin and put in my eye drops faithfully.

And despite all my efforts, my eyeballs still itched so badly I wanted to claw them out of my face and dunk them in a bucket of ice water. Without the claritin, maybe I would have.


For being something that is completely non-threatening to my health and which is essentially just my body getting in a fight with itself over some pollen dust in the air, this sure is miserable. I'd show you a picture of my blood-shot, scratchy, mascara-free eyes, but I think it would give you nightmares. Just trust me, it isn't pretty.

Lesson Learned

Please note: when you buy all the junk food necessary for 1) girls' night out, 2) a road trip, and 3) Easter, all on the same shopping trip (because those three things are all happening within 5 days of each other) you end up looking like a complete glutton.

Oops.


Happy Easter to all my Peeps! Ha!

Hypocrisy

Artwork by Duncan Long

Last night, I was messing around on the computer while Craig showered when a housefly suddenly started dive bombing me. It was really annoying. I got up and began turning off the lights to go to bed, and I discovered that Craig had left our sliding door open three inches! I guess that explains how the fly got in our house. I have to admit, I was kind of annoyed. I mean, what sort of barbarians are we that we can't shut the door properly? Are we trying to invite the local insect community into our home?

And then this morning, I remembered something.

I remembered that when I got home from taking the kids to the farm last week, I discovered that I had left our front door WIDE OPEN. As in, I don't think it could be open any wider than it was. As in, an open invitation to anyone passing by to come into our house! As in, "Come on in, people and help yourselves to anything you can find! The door is wide open!" And someone had been by, because we had a flier for a new garbage service taped to our screen door. (Apparently he was an honest guy, though, since nothing was missing.) (Thank goodness!)

So I am publicly apologizing to Craig-- who barely batted an eye when I confessed my mistake to him-- for being annoyed about the sliding door. Sorry, Craig. You're a better person than I am.

I guess we can begin working on this whole door-closing-thing together, one step (and one lock) at a time.

Alchemy

I've said before that I'm not much of a cook. I messed up my bread bowls this week and they ended up looking more like bread plates. Ah, well-- they were still good for dipping, at least.

But I have to say: the more time I spend in the kitchen, the more I appreciate the amazing qualities of heavy whipping cream. What can't this stuff do? Pour it in any sauce, and it will almost always taste good. Whip it up for a little while and you've got whipped cream, which is basically a little piece of heaven. Stir it even longer and it turns into butter! Isn't that something of a miracle? I mean, if you didn't already know this, and someone tried to explain it to you, wouldn't you think they were crazy?

And I'm not even done yet-- do all this same over-stirring, but in a freezer, and suddenly you have ice cream, which is basically akin to oxygen for me. Seriously, it's the only thing that makes a hot, humid summer enjoyable. And it's the only cold thing that I can still like even in the winter.

And now, this weekend I learned that you can brown butter to make it even yummier! How did I not know this? How many times have I eaten something with browned butter in it and not had a clue that that's what I was devouring?

It all leaves me wondering who the first people to figure all this stuff out were? Who first decided to milk a cow? And who thought to stir that milk for an hour or two and see what might happen to it? And once they had butter, who thought to try cooking it to see what that would do it? I am blown away by the genius of these people. And blown away by cream. Serious miracle liquid. (A close second is egg whites. But I'm still trying to understand those better...)

The more I think about cream, the more it begins to sound like a special potions ingredient from Harry Potter. Do vegans have any idea how much they're missing out?

Photo Dump

Here are some of the things we've been up to lately (excluding a visit from my sister this week, which I somehow managed to not take any pictures of at all-- sorry, Tracy! We loved having you, even if we didn't document it!):

Visiting Mount Vernon with my parents

George Washington's view of the Potomac.
It's funny, because he had a quote about Mt. Vernon being the most choice piece of land imaginable, and I didn't really understand why until I saw this view. Ah, yes.

Me and the kids

Craig and the kids

All of us! And we even look pretty good, too! Not bad, for us!

Planting my bulbs (I already blogged about this)

Craig has a new project he's been working on (nothing makes him happier!). Step one was to make this little bench:

Cute, huh?

Steps 2 through 57 should use up all these materials:

Hoo boy... I'll post pictures when it's done. But it should end up looking like this. Fingers crossed.

Bentley has been working on getting stronger. Batman in training, right here.

Having fun with static electricity.

Eating frozen applesauce and pretending it's ice cream.
(Kendra blinked the first time I tried to take this picture, so I took another one, instructing her to keep her eyes open. So she did!)

And going to Kidwell Farm:

And of course, doing a little thumb sucking on the side...

What have you been up to?

Priorities

At book club last week, a few of us were talking about our blogs and the other books we'd been reading in addition to the discussion book, when one of the women asked us-- her voice a mixture of shock and awe-- how in the world we found time to do all these things. We gave the usual answers, "This is what I do rather than pay attention to my kids!" and stuff like that. And I didn't think about it too much.

Until later in the conversation. When this same friend mentioned that she exercises. Every day.

And also that she cleans her bathrooms. Every day.

And suddenly I knew where I found time for blogging and reading. Because unless I have people coming over, I don't usually clean my bathrooms until they're visibly dirty. Which is pretty disgusting if you think about it. And I'm quite certain that the last time I exercised was when Kendra was a baby. In fact, I think I quit trying as soon as she began crawling.

And suddenly I hoped that this girl never ever ever looks at my bathrooms. Or at my waistline.


Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to get back to my reading.

Discoveries

When I got married, the wife of my Dad's coworker sent me a beautiful, cobalt blue KitchenAid. It was an extremely generous gift, especially considering that we had never even met. She even shipped it all the way to Utah for me. (I sent her a very nice thank you note.) Craig and I dubbed it Sir Mix-a-Lot and have enjoyed using it immensely. End of story. Or so I thought...

But just a few weeks ago, Craig (genius, and willing-to-try-new-things-out guy that he is) figured out what this tool

is for.

Maybe there was an owner's manual that I never bothered to look at or something, but I did NOT know that this little machine could knead dough for me!!!!!!! I don't have to have a countertop covered in flour?! I don't have to have my hands covered in flour?! Why didn't someone tell me about this five years ago?!?!?!

Suddenly all those yummy bread recipes that I love to try got a whole heck of a lot easier.

Suddenly I don't just enjoy my KitchenAid, I love it.

Absolutely love it.

Somewhere That's Green

When Craig and I bought our home, one of the big selling points for us was the green area behind it. I grew up in the woods, and at the time, you couldn't see any houses from my house. It always made me feel safe and secure. The idea of people so close by, possibly looking in my windows, bothers me. I like my privacy! And I like looking at all those trees and the birds hopping around in them. It's always sad when the leaves fall off and suddenly I can see the houses on the other side of the green area. But then the reverse is true and as soon as those new leaves shoot out, I'm so excited to be able to pretend that there is no one else around again!

Yesterday, as I glanced out the window while changing Ryder, I realized I was seeing orange. A fox! We were able to watch as he climbed around our wood pile and even approached our fence before finally slinking away. This isn't the first time I've seen a fox back there, but this was definitely the best view of one that I've ever had. And then, a few minutes later, I looked again and I could see the little fox on the other side of the creek, and between him and our house, two deer! As if he just couldn't bear to be left out, our groundhog also popped out from under our neighbor's porch.

I feel that I have quite the magical backyard.