Last But Not Least: Bentley!

Ah, Bentley.  My first-born.  My first son.  My guinea pig.  My child sent to teach me patience.

I'll be honest-- in many ways, Bentley is my most difficult child.  There's a nursery rhyme that goes, "There once was a girl, who had a little curl, right in the middle of her forehead.  And when she was good she was very, very good, but when she was bad she was horrid."  That kind of sums up Bentley (minus the curl)-- he can be so sweet and good.  But when he's not, watch out!

The funny thing, though, is that the stuff Bentley does that drives me crazy are all traits he got from me, a fact which Craig enjoys pointing out, especially when I say things like, "Geez, why won't he just stop talking for a few minutes?!?!?" or "Why does he insist on wearing the same clothes all the time, even though they're full of holes?!?!!?"  And there's no question that Bentley inherited his bad temper from me, not Craig.

So the things that make Bentley difficult are both things that are especially good at irking me, and which I need to be especially forgiving of, because I'm guilty of them all, too. 

But to focus on those things is to miss all the wonderful things that make Bentley so fun!  The kid has more energy than I can believe-- he can run and jump and play and be goofy all day long (and apparently without any real need to eat-- wish I could do that!).  He can be so silly and playful and fun when he wants to be.  And he can be really helpful-- he's made a tremendous effort since Colton's arrival to help Mommy out as needed.

The really difficult thing with Bentley, and I think it's the same with every first child, is the comparison of how I treat Ryder with how I treated Bentley at the same age.  I can remember screaming at Bentley for making messes or being difficult-- the same things that hardly phase me when Ryder does them.  Because now I understand that Ryder is only two years old, for crying out loud.  Of course he's going to act this way!  Every 2-year-old kicks off their shoes the second your back is turned and has an insatiable curiosity to know what will happen when you push stuff off the high chair tray.  But with Bentley, I always expected him to act way older than his age, simply because I didn't understand what was normal and age-appropriate behavior.  So I have the most guilt and the most regrets with how hard I can be on him.  But somehow, I still keep expecting him to act much older than his age, and find myself wanting to yell, "You're six years old, you should know better!"  I have to stop and ask myself, Really?  Should he, at six years old?  And the answer is, I don't really know...

Pretending to sleep during dinner.  Of course!

But those are just my issues.  Let me actually tell you about Bentley now!

Like everyone in my family, Bentley likes to pick something he's interested in and then obsess over it.  Some of his favorites have been bats, wolves, alligators, sharks (a lot of predators, actually)... and now it's been robots for quite some time.  So we look up videos of robots on youtube and get books from the library about them-- I learn a lot from my kids' interests!  Recently he's also gotten excited about Ninjago and is thinking he wants to take Tae Kwan Do or something like it.   (Maybe for his birthday...)  Based on the number of kids-- especially girls-- who make a point of saying Hello to him when we're leaving school, I think he must either go to a really friendly school or else is good at getting people to like him.

It's been fun watching his learning take off in school this year.  He's really reading now, which thrills me, and he's starting to understand better that he needs to actually do his school work.  (I wasn't a very good student until around 3rd grade, so I'm pretty sure that with continued encouragement, Bentley will do great in the years to come.)  One of my favorite quotes from Bentley was when he said, "Once you start reading, it's like you just want to read everything!"  He's a child after my own heart.

I think Bentley is fairly athletic, and one of my goals is to get my act together enough to put him in soccer or baseball or something.  He's been taking swimming lessons this last year and making good progress, but I think something where he will use up more energy (probably soccer) would be really good for him.  Craig wanted to enroll him this spring, but having just had a baby, it was too overwhelming for me right then.  But I'm hopeful that we can make it work in the fall.

Being silly at the park

He has LOVED doing Tiger Scouts this year.  And much as I sometimes get frustrated by how much time it takes up, I have to confess that seeing my little boy in his uniform melts my heart every single time.  Every single time.

Working on the cake for the Blue and Gold Dinner

Pretending to be arrested

Visiting the Battlefield

Sitting in the back of the "Paddy Wagon" with Evan and Peter, his fellow Den members.  I love the look on Bentley's face!

And one other story from the other day: my Mom took us to the Olive Garden this week, but Ryder (who had only had a nap in the car) was being pretty difficult.  Finally as we wrapped things up, I offered to take Ryder and Bentley outside, rather than risk Ryder causing any more disruptions.  What I actually said, though, was "I'll take the boys outside before they cause any more trouble."  Almost immediately, Bentley spoke up.  "Excuse me," he protested, "But I have been very good this whole time here."  And he's was right-- he had been very good-- so I apologized.  Profusely.  And told him, quite honestly, what a pleasure it had been to have him at the restaurant with us.  I wasn't sure if I was more impressed with his good behavior, or with his ability to stick up for himself.  Both made me very proud of him, though.

Oh, I love my Bentley!