Tale of Woe

We were supposed to close on our house on August 15th.  Unfortunately, when that day rolled around, our buyers were missing one document.  Apparently, whatever form the IRS was supposed to send in, they sent them a completely blank piece of paper instead.  This caused much worrying amongst us, as we at first thought they'd been sent a blank form-- did this mean they hadn't paid their taxes?  were they illegal immigrants?  What was going on here?  But once we understood that it wasn't a form at all, just blank paper, we figured it was just a silly computer glitch.  We extended the contract another week to give them time to sort that out.

A week went by, and they got the IRS document, but the bank needed a few more days to complete the paper work.  We extended one more week, with the spoken caveat that if they weren't able to close before the end of the month, they were going to pay September's mortgage payment for us.

Thursday night I got a text from my agent saying they were all set to close on Friday at 10:30am.  Huzzah!  She reminded me that I needed to shut off all our utilities, so I spent Friday morning working on that.  Around noon I texted my agent to make sure everything had gone smoothly.  I didn't hear back from her.

When Craig left work a little after four, I told him to call our realtor and see what was going on.  She hadn't heard anything from the buying agent but the title company had told her they hadn't closed.  She had been calling and emailing the buying agent all afternoon with no response, so she was going over to his broker's office to find out what the story was.  When she got there, she learned that one of the co-signers on the loan (the brother of the woman who was actually purchasing our house) had bought himself an $80,000 truck the night before.  And now he no longer had the credit score to take out such a loan.  (The buying agent apparently was dealing with all this by trying to bury his head in the sand.  He tried to claim he didn't know what had happened, but the loan officer assured us that he had known since the night before.  Awesome.)

The poor woman buying the house-- Rosa-- has three kids and was hoping to move in over the weekend.  She was devastated.  And we were pissed.  We all got screwed over by this idiot brother.  Rosa has some other family member (a brother-in-law?) who she thought could co-sign on the loan instead, but that would still mean starting the entire loan application process over again, so we told her no to that, and put the house back on the market at midnight that night.  And we're pocketing the earnest money they offered us (which in hind sight wasn't nearly enough), since they wasted two months of our time (and prime real estate time at that). 

Our agent had an open house today and we've already had five people come and see it.


Here's hoping we'll get another, much better offer very soon.


Hope springs eternal, right?

The Object of Our Affections

The other day, Colton began chanting, "Hamil lahkshmi!"  I couldn't figure out what he was saying for a bit, although it amused me that it sounded vaguely middle eastern or something.  I finally got it: Camille likes me.  That's what he was so excited to tell me.  I assured him he was correct and that Camille loves him.  Then Ryder piped up that, "No, Camille likes me!"  And then they were fighting.  Over her affection.

How lucky she is to be so loved!

Also, the other day I overheard Ryder telling Bentley and Kendra, "I'm goofy and I'm funny.  Which means I'm hilarious."  (It's even funnier if you replace all the "l"s and "r"s with "w"s.  Trust me.)

And finally, look who's getting pretty good at sitting up!

So proud of herself!

Desperate Much?

It's been-- what-- 48 hours since I logged on to facebook?  And they're already sending me notifications about all the things I've "missed." 

Facebook, you're acting some really insecure girlfriend, the clingy kind who freaks out if her texts aren't acknowledged within 5 seconds of being sent.  It's a little pathetic.

And it does not make me want to come back.


In the meantime, this morning I've managed to fold and put away two loads of laundry, while another load was in the washer (and is now in the dryer).  I've cleaned the toilets, sinks and mirrors in most of the bathrooms.  And it isn't quite 9:30am.  There has to be a correlation between my increased productivity and my lack of facebook.  There just has to.

Camille sleeping late might have something to do with it, too, though...

A More Purposeful Life

I'm slowly whittling away the things that suck my time away from me.  It's very difficult, because it turns out that I'm completely addicted to facebook.  And the many blogs I read.  And Failbooking.  And movie reviews by Eric Snider.  And a host of other things.

But I'm realizing that when I spend almost an entire afternoon reading the reviews of all the movies  from A-H that I'm even remotely interested in, I don't feel very happy with myself.  (Even though I adore Eric Snider's writing-- you really should check out some of his reviews so he'll still have pelnty of traffic on his site even without me around!)  And some of my favorite wastes of time-- like Failbooking and PostSecret-- have a bad tendency to leave me feeling yucky or scared for humanity.  So why do I keep visiting those websites?  I've decided to put a stop to that.

I've been wondering for months now (possibly even years?) if I should just close my facebook account and remove that waste of time, but I could never quite bring myself to do it.  For every 3 hours I waste there, there's the occasional birth announcement or wedding announcement that I'm really pleased to learn about.  But that's still a lot of "Click Share if You Have a Daughter You Love More than Anyone Else Loves Their Daughter" memes to sort through in order to get that one bit of information that I actually cared about.  And I spend just enough time sitting around nursing the baby that gives me a perfect chance to sit and stare at my phone, that I figured it was fine.  But recently, it doesn't take Camille very long to eat, so I'm still staring at the phone long after she's done (and possibly ignoring other little children around me during that time).  And honestly, if I am sitting around, why not spend that time staring at a good book, which at least I find worthwhile?

Finally, yesterday, as I was thinking about deleting my account, the thought occurred to me, "What if I just didn't look at facebook for today?"  That seemed so much more manageable.  So I did it.  One day with no facebook.  And I didn't miss it at all.

So now I'm not looking at it today, either.

And during the time when I wasn't there, I managed to do some on-line training I'd been meaning to get around to for three weeks now (for my new, terrifying calling as the Cub scout committee chair).  And I got the dishwasher loaded, run, and emptied, so we'll have plenty of clean spoons for dinner tonight.  And I got four loads of laundry folded and put away.  And I even fed Camille solid food, which I'd been meaning to get around to doing for two weeks now...

So I'm definitely more productive without facebook.  And I feel better about that.  I'm not saying that I won't ever look at it again-- but I'm going to try to keep it to a healthy minimum from now on.

I'm not cutting out blogs just yet.  I don't think they're a waste of time, since the ones I read are either by my friends (Hi, you!) or are well written enough that I think they're good for me to read.  (Or both!)  But it might be time to cut out a few of the recipe blogs I enjoy that have turned into travelogues and ads (I'm looking at you, Picky Palate).

I realize it's a bit ironic to blog about how I'm trying to not waste as much time on-line.  But I think you can see the difference as well as I can.  I'm working on producing more and consuming less, mentally speaking.  I'm trying, at the end of the day, to be able to say to myself, "I accomplished something."


But if you know of anyone having a baby or getting married, please tell me!  I really want to hear about that!

People who know when the deadlines are should probably be shot

Craig informed me last night that we were already late if we wanted to sign our kids up for soccer.  How is this possible?  School hasn't even started yet!  In fact, it starts tomorrow.  And while I'm completely happy about that fact, it does seem very early to me, to be starting school in the middle of August like that. 

So if school is starting exceptionally early, how is it that soccer already began???

Let me make one thing perfectly clear: my whole game plan was to sign them up for stuff like that once they were back in school and I actually would have a moment to bother with these things (so, probably in about two weeks).  I sort of thought the fact that I registered them for school AND got them library cards made me a good mother.  Finding a pediatrician, piano teacher, and soccer league were all things I figured we could put off for a few more weeks.  (And don't even try to tell me that finding a pediatrician ranks higher than a library card.  No, it doesn't.)

Anyway.  School starts tomorrow and I'm already behind.  This parenting thing is a tough gig sometimes... 

And I'm pretty certain that a "fall sport" should not be allowed to start before September.  That's just science.

Another Anniversary

Today is Craig and my ten year anniversary.  And an event like this calls for pictures, so I will be scattering pictures from our engagement shoot throughout the text of this post.  I don't think we used any of these, so you can think of them as outtakes.  They make me smile-- I have a hard time thinking of myself as getting older, until I see how young we look here!

We kept laughing, which was a lot of fun, but makes for smiles a little too big for this kind of picture...

We had high hopes of going to Hawaii to celebrate this momentous occasion, but between having Camille and Craig getting a new job, it's looking like that will have to be put off for a while.  As if that wasn't bad enough, tonight is the open house for CATEC, so Craig will be working late, and I will be spending the day with the kids.  Not exactly the stuff of Hollywood movies and brag-worthy facebook posts.

Man, I was skinny...

But I don't mind.  This feels like more of a chance for quiet contemplation than having a big party, and ten years is a lot to reflect on.  I plan on getting out my wedding album and showing it to the kids after dinner-- I'll have fun, even if they don't!

Craig looks so young here...

Craig and I have seen and done a lot together in these ten years: four different homes (two of which were apartments); three degrees; five children; two new jobs for Craig and me turning into a serial pregnant lady; three different cities we've lived in; vacations to South Carolina, California, Texas, Hawaii, Seattle, DisneyWorld, and Oregon, plus lots of camping trips in Virginia (and one in Utah); construction projects, sliced fingers, home births, teeth knocked out; tears and laughter, arguments, the occasional disappointment, but mostly the overwhelming joy of these last ten years...  So much living crammed into these ten years.

I love the look of adoration on my face.  Can you tell how much I love my Craig?

We did use this picture, or part of it.  Craig did the color effects himself, and I loved how it turned out.

People talk about how marriage is work, but-- as Middle-Aged Mormon Man said-- to  me, being married to Craig is as natural as breathing.  Or people will talk about how marrying their spouse was the best decision they ever made.  But I hardly needed to decide to marry Craig-- the whole time we were dating, I felt like I was working to convince him to marry me (and, quite frankly, screwing that up as often as not).  When he finally asked, there was never any doubt what my answer would be.  No one had ever made me as happy as Craig did.

And still does today.

Happy Anniversary, my Love.

The Lies We Tell Ourselves

We thought we'd be able to sign papers on our house on Saturday, so Craig and I geared up to make what we hoped would be our last trip to Manassas for a while.  The paperwork didn't end up being ready on time, but we had other loose ends to tie up, so in a fit of optimism we all made the trip anyway.  Craig had to be in one location acting like a grown-up, so I figured it would be fun to swing by our house and let the kids play in the backyard one last time. 

Unfortunately, nothing went quite as planned.  None of the kids' friends were around when we arrived, so they spent the entire time fighting and getting bit by mosquitoes (despite the fact that I brought bug spray and insisted on them using it).  The house was kind of dusty and cobwebby and had resorted to its old smell from before we moved in.  (All of you who have ever been to my house, PLEASE tell me it didn't smell like that while we were living there?!?!?!)  And the whole thing was kind of sad.  Once Craig was able to join us, we did spend a few minutes sharing our favorite memory of the house, which was very nice until my neighbor popped in to say Hi.  (I love my neighbor and was very happy to see her again, but I wish she could have given us just five more minutes first.)  And by the time she was done gabbing, we needed to leave, so we didn't really get to finish or take a picture like I'd wanted to do.

To make matters worse, most of the people I had hoped to see in Manassas either weren't around or were busy, so I only managed to see one friend while we were there (but I sure was excited to see her, even if it was only for a few minutes!).

We did get to eat at Cafe Rio.  And on the way in to town, we stopped at the Moo-Thru.  So it's not like it was a bad trip.  It just wasn't quite the glorious-if-slightly-melancholy homecoming I'd been envisioning.

They say that you can never go home again, and it's true, I'm afraid.  As we were preparing to leave, I kept telling people that we didn't really need to say good-bye because we'd be back to visit.  And we have been back to visit, but it never is quite the same.  I was fooling myself when I said that.

My home is in Charlottesville now, even if a chunk of my heart will always be in Manassas.

Fortunately, I really do love Charlottesville, and more so each day.  We live in such a beautiful place.  So while I will always have very fond memories of Manassas, I am very happy here. 

This is a panorama I took from the top of Carter Mountain, a lovely orchard and farm near our house.  I think that the houses you can make out in the center are probably part of the housing development where we live, so you get the general idea of my neighborhood!

Of Note

-Good intentions will get you one pound off.  Unfortunately, good intentions seem to be about all I got in the exercise department right now.  I went running that one time, and then Camille keeps waking up at 5am.  And we keep going to bed at midnight.  And I just don't think I can be a decent mom on that little sleep.  I have started doing these little 7-minute workouts (four days in a row-- woot!) so that's better than nothing.  And I have cut back on the snacking, although I still have a long way to go there...  Baby steps?

-Speaking of my parenting skills, I feel like God keeps upping the ante on me.  Two weeks ago it hit me that *maybe* I shouldn't be annoyed every time my kids want to talk to me and was working on that, and feeling pretty good about the progress I was making by not yelling and screaming about everything.  So then, I get asked to teach Relief Society this coming week, and the lesson is all about being a good parent, with lots of suggestions that I need to start doing.  (And they're good ones, too, so I can't even shrug them off!)  And if that wasn't bad enough, I wound up watching Inside Out twice and it was really hitting me how quickly kids grow up and how I need to be better about enjoying the moment and then I realized that, at close to 9 years old, Bentley is halfway done with his time living at home before he'll head off to college!  How completely freaky is that???  So I'm trying even harder.  I'm trying to enjoy my kids and talk to them and teach them and be the Mom I always assumed I would be.  Before life got in the way and I got busy and tired and stressed out and grumpy.

I like this picture of Colton hanging out with my Dad

-To that end, yesterday we were planning on going to the library, but when we drove by this awesome park, we changed our plans and went there instead.  The kids had a blast and we can't wait to go back!  It was so fun to find a park where the playground equipment didn't look just like the playground equipment at every other park!

-Still working on getting our house in Manassas sold.  Everything was going smoothly-- even the home inspection didn't turn much up!-- until the appraisal.  Apparently the woman hired to appraise the house knows absolutely nothing about homes, fair market value, or anything.  And she appraised it for less than we were getting.  (Just to give you an example, she thought the tile Craig had just put in was laminate.  She said, "When I tapped my camera on it, it didn't feel like tile."  'Cuz, you know, the good old camera tap is the standard for these things...)  Anyway, after much debate and a lot of angry ranting on our part, we finally just took the lower price rather than listing the house again.  But we're still pretty upset about the whole thing.  It's infuriating when someone so stupid and inconsequential has so much control over you and there's no way to appeal or change it.

-We DID finally manage to close on our house here in Charlottesville, so that was good to finally get checked off the list.  This was also infuriating, since the bank kept saying we'd close "in a few days" and then not being able to.  I don't understand what all these underwriters are doing and why it's so hard for them to actually do their job?  Isn't this all they do???  How are they so bad at it?

Here's a cute picture of Camille to counteract my frustrations

-Colton is figuring out how to open doors.  I feel like this is one of those developments where as a parent you just sort of stare in horror at your world falling down around you.  Obviously, he needed to figure this out eventually but hoo boy, it's gonna make my life more complicated!

Here Colton is reading a children's version of the Book of Mormon.  He asked for it by saying, "More more Jesus"

-For her birthday (back in February) Kendra got a gift certificate for live butterflies!  We were waiting until the weather was warm to order them, and then when we found out we were moving, that got pushed back again.  I was delighted when Kendra knew right where her gift certificate was so we were finally able to order them!  They came as caterpillars and turned into chrysalises almost immediately.  One of them failed to attach to the ceiling of their cup, so we didn't think that one would make it.  But we were delighted when it did!  She ended up with five beautiful butterflies, which we released just a few days ago!

Painted Lady

Apparently these are the most social of butterflies, and the most likely to land on your hand or shirt!

-Colton also is doing all sorts of adorable things these days: he gallops slightly sideways from room to room; if he's feeling shy he'll suddenly slouch over in the worst posture ever (we picture him asking some girl to the prom this way and die laughing at the idea of it)...  And he's continuously building up his vocabulary.  His recent acquisitions are down and up, and he'll hold toys up and down and yell about where they are, and occasionally make them fly and fall down.  It's fun-- and noisy!-- to see him developing.

Very sleepy Colton on our way home from swimming in a nearby lake.  Love that look on his face...!

-The big kids are all registered for school, and I can hardly believe it starts in about two weeks!  This summer has been the weirdest ever, with the move and Craig's new job.  It's felt long and short all at the same time, and while part of me is relieved to have them back in school (and for them to finally ride a bus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I'm always sad to see summer end...

-I'm still trying to figure out what to do with Ryder for preschool.  There are a couple co-op preschool groups in the church here, but they both have younger kids (one group is 3-year-olds, the other group is 2-year-olds), so that seems a little silly for Ryder, since he'll be 5 in November.  I should probably just sign him up for a real preschool, but I hate to do that until I have a better idea what our finances are-- what Craig's take-home pay will be, how much we're spending on groceries here, what our house payments really will be...  All that stuff.  I hate to commit another few hundred dollars a month without that information...  Can you sign up for preschool late?

Ryder plays so nicely with Camille!

-I'm also getting really frustrated with how I have to do everything at least twice for it to actually be done.  I put something in the diaper bag, and then in the process of picking up the diaper bag, that thing gets caught on the straps and falls back out again.  I throw something in the garbage and miss.  I call and cancel our garbage service in Manassas and then get a bill a month later for the same payment I already made.  I spend 20 minutes looking for a receipt so I can return something to Target, I get there and somehow managed to not bring the receipt...  We buy new doorknobs for the house, realize they're not the keyed the same, so we have to bring them back and have them re-keyed.  But when we bring them back we don't have all of them so we still need to return two more...    And in the middle of all this, Craig gets a flat tire so he takes my car so I'm stuck at home for the day...  This stuff just kind of kills my soul.  I know none of it is a very big deal, but it grinds me down in a very bad way.  Everything is just a little too far away, and Craig is just too busy, and we have a few too many kids to do things like this easily, so then when we have to do it all TWICE...  That's when I have to be really careful and not start taking my frustrations out on the people around me.  (Sorry, Craig.  Sorry, kids...)

Better add some more cute pictures to help me calm down...

Much better...!

-After finally getting to cook a few meals at home, I have concluded that I LOVE my kitchen.  Love, love, LOVE it.  It's not very big, which I'm sure to some people would be a hit against it, but I think it is perfect.  Everything is close by, so I can grab whatever I need quickly.  But there's plenty of counter space, so I never feel like I don't have room for whatever I'm doing.  It's perfect for me.  Cooking in it (and even cleaning up and putting everything in it's place) makes me so happy.  The only thing I didn't especially love was the way the silverware basket in the dishwasher was attached to the door.  It never worked very well.  And then I figured out that it could also attach to the end of the lower rack!  So now that's perfect, too.  And I felt like a genius for figuring it out.  So that was great.

Yeah, I got a couple degrees from college...

That's everything I can think of for now!