Always Learning

Several months ago when my sister Tracy was visiting, she mentioned a beautiful piece of music she'd heard at a concert called "Mostly Mozart."  It was the 2nd movement of the 7th symphony, and was used in the movie The King's Speech (which ranks right up there in my book as one of the best movies of all time).  It took me several times of playing it on YouTube before I noticed that my search was being autocorrected because it was composed by Beethoven, not Mozart (I guess they were being honest when they called themselves Mostly Mozart).  I bet those YouTube people thought I was an idiot!

Anyway, I've been playing it a lot these days.  I can't get over how quietly moving and powerful it is (especially when it's not very quiet any more).  Let it go on the record that I want this playing when they carry my casket away at my funeral, okay?  Here-- you should listen to it:




So that's the first thing.

The second thing is also from months ago when I decided for Mommy School we would talk about Vincent van Gogh.  Because who doesn't love a guy who slices off his own ear?  (And yes, I did tell the kids that story, although I didn't get too detailed with the whole part about him giving it to a prostitute.)  Anyway, while I was reading up on him in wikipedia-- yes, that bastion of knowledge-- I came across this painting:

When I first saw it, I just thought, "Oh, yeah, the picture on David Sedaris' book, When You Are Engulfed in Flames."  It was another minute before my brain clicked into working mode and I thought, "Wait-- why is this on the van Gogh page of Wikipedia???"  So I had to go poking around to figure out that this was in fact painted by van Gogh.  (Duh.)  But holy crap, this is not what I think of when I picture his works!  I spent a few hours feeling like a failure as a humanities major.

But really, this begs the question: Did David Sedaris explain this in his book?  And did I totally forget, only to be surprised when I came across the information four-and-a-half years later?  Because if this is the case, then I REALLY need to get my brain functioning again.



Now I'm going to have to go back and read that book again...

But Beethoven's 2nd Movement in his 7th Symphony!  Have you been listening to it while you read?  Isn't it wonderful??

Open Letter to Camille

Open Letters seem to be all the rage in passive-aggressiveness these days.  I've seen a few that I really liked, but most of them (the ones I don't agree with, I suppose) just kind of annoy me.  But who am I to deny this bandwagon when it's so easy to jump on it?  So here we go-- my first "open letter"!



Dearest Camille,

You know we love you.  We love you so much!  Your little smile brings joy to our hearts every day. 

But.  Now that the school year has begun, we need to get a few things cleared up.  Namely, how the morning routine is going to go down.  The twenty minutes between 7am and 7:20am is what I think of as "Go Time."  It's the time when Bentley and Kendra are frantically scrambling to finally brush their teeth, brush their hair, get their shoes on, say our morning prayers, and GET OUT THE DOOR.  If we try to get any of those things done before Go Time, they just get undone and demand even more time and attention, so getting up earlier/being more efficient does no good.  Go Time is so specific and frantic, it is nearly a religious experience as Mommy summons every ounce of energy she has to bring order to chaos and try to get little people out the door and onto the bus on time.  Everyone is running around trying to remember what it is they're supposed to be doing and mommy has to constantly remind them and check to make sure they actually did it.  (You would think that after multiple years of leaving the house, Kendra would know that she needs to brush her hair first, but alas, this is not the case.  And I really try my best to not send her to school looking like a complete ragamuffin, so this means reminding and occasionally yelling and threatening to get that hair brushed each morning.)  Lunches need to be made and stuffed into backpacks.  Water bottles need to be refilled.  Sweatshirts and shoes must be found.  And we must review just how to tie shoes because this is not second nature just yet.  (Why didn't I buy Kendra one more pair of velcro shoes???  What was I thinking???)

Camille, as much as I love you and try my best to see to your every need, you must understand that you are NOT allowed to wake up and demand to be fed during that time.  It just does NOT work.  You can wake up earlier if you have to (I don't love it, but I will duly climb out of bed and get you some nice warm milk), and certainly as soon as Bentley and Kendra are out the door, I'm happy to do anything and everything for you.  But not during those twenty minutes!

Or, if you really are so hungry that you just have to wake up during that time, then goshdarnit, you are going to have to learn to eat without letting every single tiny noise disturb you and cause you to stare at the source of that noise with a very annoyed look on that adorable face of yours.  Because despite the fact that EVERY DAY when your siblings come home from school, I ask what papers I need to sign, they still never seem to remember those papers until two minutes before it's time to leave.  And the way you eat, I can't sign papers and feed you simultaneously.  So the solution is clear: either you need to sleep just a few minutes longer, or you need to figure out how to eat through all the chaos.

Camille, I am here for you through everything.  Every smile, every milestone, every new experience.  I'm here for you when you're sad.  I'm here for you five or six times a day (and sometimes more!) when your diaper needs to be changed.  I'm here for every feeding, every change of clothes, every spit up.  But please-- those 20 minutes!  Let me have those 20 minutes to get the big kids out the door!  It's all I ask of you!

Your everloving,
      Mommy

Tale of Woe

We were supposed to close on our house on August 15th.  Unfortunately, when that day rolled around, our buyers were missing one document.  Apparently, whatever form the IRS was supposed to send in, they sent them a completely blank piece of paper instead.  This caused much worrying amongst us, as we at first thought they'd been sent a blank form-- did this mean they hadn't paid their taxes?  were they illegal immigrants?  What was going on here?  But once we understood that it wasn't a form at all, just blank paper, we figured it was just a silly computer glitch.  We extended the contract another week to give them time to sort that out.

A week went by, and they got the IRS document, but the bank needed a few more days to complete the paper work.  We extended one more week, with the spoken caveat that if they weren't able to close before the end of the month, they were going to pay September's mortgage payment for us.

Thursday night I got a text from my agent saying they were all set to close on Friday at 10:30am.  Huzzah!  She reminded me that I needed to shut off all our utilities, so I spent Friday morning working on that.  Around noon I texted my agent to make sure everything had gone smoothly.  I didn't hear back from her.

When Craig left work a little after four, I told him to call our realtor and see what was going on.  She hadn't heard anything from the buying agent but the title company had told her they hadn't closed.  She had been calling and emailing the buying agent all afternoon with no response, so she was going over to his broker's office to find out what the story was.  When she got there, she learned that one of the co-signers on the loan (the brother of the woman who was actually purchasing our house) had bought himself an $80,000 truck the night before.  And now he no longer had the credit score to take out such a loan.  (The buying agent apparently was dealing with all this by trying to bury his head in the sand.  He tried to claim he didn't know what had happened, but the loan officer assured us that he had known since the night before.  Awesome.)

The poor woman buying the house-- Rosa-- has three kids and was hoping to move in over the weekend.  She was devastated.  And we were pissed.  We all got screwed over by this idiot brother.  Rosa has some other family member (a brother-in-law?) who she thought could co-sign on the loan instead, but that would still mean starting the entire loan application process over again, so we told her no to that, and put the house back on the market at midnight that night.  And we're pocketing the earnest money they offered us (which in hind sight wasn't nearly enough), since they wasted two months of our time (and prime real estate time at that). 

Our agent had an open house today and we've already had five people come and see it.


Here's hoping we'll get another, much better offer very soon.


Hope springs eternal, right?

The Object of Our Affections

The other day, Colton began chanting, "Hamil lahkshmi!"  I couldn't figure out what he was saying for a bit, although it amused me that it sounded vaguely middle eastern or something.  I finally got it: Camille likes me.  That's what he was so excited to tell me.  I assured him he was correct and that Camille loves him.  Then Ryder piped up that, "No, Camille likes me!"  And then they were fighting.  Over her affection.

How lucky she is to be so loved!

Also, the other day I overheard Ryder telling Bentley and Kendra, "I'm goofy and I'm funny.  Which means I'm hilarious."  (It's even funnier if you replace all the "l"s and "r"s with "w"s.  Trust me.)

And finally, look who's getting pretty good at sitting up!

So proud of herself!

Desperate Much?

It's been-- what-- 48 hours since I logged on to facebook?  And they're already sending me notifications about all the things I've "missed." 

Facebook, you're acting some really insecure girlfriend, the clingy kind who freaks out if her texts aren't acknowledged within 5 seconds of being sent.  It's a little pathetic.

And it does not make me want to come back.


In the meantime, this morning I've managed to fold and put away two loads of laundry, while another load was in the washer (and is now in the dryer).  I've cleaned the toilets, sinks and mirrors in most of the bathrooms.  And it isn't quite 9:30am.  There has to be a correlation between my increased productivity and my lack of facebook.  There just has to.

Camille sleeping late might have something to do with it, too, though...

A More Purposeful Life

I'm slowly whittling away the things that suck my time away from me.  It's very difficult, because it turns out that I'm completely addicted to facebook.  And the many blogs I read.  And Failbooking.  And movie reviews by Eric Snider.  And a host of other things.

But I'm realizing that when I spend almost an entire afternoon reading the reviews of all the movies  from A-H that I'm even remotely interested in, I don't feel very happy with myself.  (Even though I adore Eric Snider's writing-- you really should check out some of his reviews so he'll still have pelnty of traffic on his site even without me around!)  And some of my favorite wastes of time-- like Failbooking and PostSecret-- have a bad tendency to leave me feeling yucky or scared for humanity.  So why do I keep visiting those websites?  I've decided to put a stop to that.

I've been wondering for months now (possibly even years?) if I should just close my facebook account and remove that waste of time, but I could never quite bring myself to do it.  For every 3 hours I waste there, there's the occasional birth announcement or wedding announcement that I'm really pleased to learn about.  But that's still a lot of "Click Share if You Have a Daughter You Love More than Anyone Else Loves Their Daughter" memes to sort through in order to get that one bit of information that I actually cared about.  And I spend just enough time sitting around nursing the baby that gives me a perfect chance to sit and stare at my phone, that I figured it was fine.  But recently, it doesn't take Camille very long to eat, so I'm still staring at the phone long after she's done (and possibly ignoring other little children around me during that time).  And honestly, if I am sitting around, why not spend that time staring at a good book, which at least I find worthwhile?

Finally, yesterday, as I was thinking about deleting my account, the thought occurred to me, "What if I just didn't look at facebook for today?"  That seemed so much more manageable.  So I did it.  One day with no facebook.  And I didn't miss it at all.

So now I'm not looking at it today, either.

And during the time when I wasn't there, I managed to do some on-line training I'd been meaning to get around to for three weeks now (for my new, terrifying calling as the Cub scout committee chair).  And I got the dishwasher loaded, run, and emptied, so we'll have plenty of clean spoons for dinner tonight.  And I got four loads of laundry folded and put away.  And I even fed Camille solid food, which I'd been meaning to get around to doing for two weeks now...

So I'm definitely more productive without facebook.  And I feel better about that.  I'm not saying that I won't ever look at it again-- but I'm going to try to keep it to a healthy minimum from now on.

I'm not cutting out blogs just yet.  I don't think they're a waste of time, since the ones I read are either by my friends (Hi, you!) or are well written enough that I think they're good for me to read.  (Or both!)  But it might be time to cut out a few of the recipe blogs I enjoy that have turned into travelogues and ads (I'm looking at you, Picky Palate).

I realize it's a bit ironic to blog about how I'm trying to not waste as much time on-line.  But I think you can see the difference as well as I can.  I'm working on producing more and consuming less, mentally speaking.  I'm trying, at the end of the day, to be able to say to myself, "I accomplished something."


But if you know of anyone having a baby or getting married, please tell me!  I really want to hear about that!

People who know when the deadlines are should probably be shot

Craig informed me last night that we were already late if we wanted to sign our kids up for soccer.  How is this possible?  School hasn't even started yet!  In fact, it starts tomorrow.  And while I'm completely happy about that fact, it does seem very early to me, to be starting school in the middle of August like that. 

So if school is starting exceptionally early, how is it that soccer already began???

Let me make one thing perfectly clear: my whole game plan was to sign them up for stuff like that once they were back in school and I actually would have a moment to bother with these things (so, probably in about two weeks).  I sort of thought the fact that I registered them for school AND got them library cards made me a good mother.  Finding a pediatrician, piano teacher, and soccer league were all things I figured we could put off for a few more weeks.  (And don't even try to tell me that finding a pediatrician ranks higher than a library card.  No, it doesn't.)

Anyway.  School starts tomorrow and I'm already behind.  This parenting thing is a tough gig sometimes... 

And I'm pretty certain that a "fall sport" should not be allowed to start before September.  That's just science.

Another Anniversary

Today is Craig and my ten year anniversary.  And an event like this calls for pictures, so I will be scattering pictures from our engagement shoot throughout the text of this post.  I don't think we used any of these, so you can think of them as outtakes.  They make me smile-- I have a hard time thinking of myself as getting older, until I see how young we look here!

We kept laughing, which was a lot of fun, but makes for smiles a little too big for this kind of picture...

We had high hopes of going to Hawaii to celebrate this momentous occasion, but between having Camille and Craig getting a new job, it's looking like that will have to be put off for a while.  As if that wasn't bad enough, tonight is the open house for CATEC, so Craig will be working late, and I will be spending the day with the kids.  Not exactly the stuff of Hollywood movies and brag-worthy facebook posts.

Man, I was skinny...

But I don't mind.  This feels like more of a chance for quiet contemplation than having a big party, and ten years is a lot to reflect on.  I plan on getting out my wedding album and showing it to the kids after dinner-- I'll have fun, even if they don't!

Craig looks so young here...

Craig and I have seen and done a lot together in these ten years: four different homes (two of which were apartments); three degrees; five children; two new jobs for Craig and me turning into a serial pregnant lady; three different cities we've lived in; vacations to South Carolina, California, Texas, Hawaii, Seattle, DisneyWorld, and Oregon, plus lots of camping trips in Virginia (and one in Utah); construction projects, sliced fingers, home births, teeth knocked out; tears and laughter, arguments, the occasional disappointment, but mostly the overwhelming joy of these last ten years...  So much living crammed into these ten years.

I love the look of adoration on my face.  Can you tell how much I love my Craig?

We did use this picture, or part of it.  Craig did the color effects himself, and I loved how it turned out.

People talk about how marriage is work, but-- as Middle-Aged Mormon Man said-- to  me, being married to Craig is as natural as breathing.  Or people will talk about how marrying their spouse was the best decision they ever made.  But I hardly needed to decide to marry Craig-- the whole time we were dating, I felt like I was working to convince him to marry me (and, quite frankly, screwing that up as often as not).  When he finally asked, there was never any doubt what my answer would be.  No one had ever made me as happy as Craig did.

And still does today.

Happy Anniversary, my Love.

The Lies We Tell Ourselves

We thought we'd be able to sign papers on our house on Saturday, so Craig and I geared up to make what we hoped would be our last trip to Manassas for a while.  The paperwork didn't end up being ready on time, but we had other loose ends to tie up, so in a fit of optimism we all made the trip anyway.  Craig had to be in one location acting like a grown-up, so I figured it would be fun to swing by our house and let the kids play in the backyard one last time. 

Unfortunately, nothing went quite as planned.  None of the kids' friends were around when we arrived, so they spent the entire time fighting and getting bit by mosquitoes (despite the fact that I brought bug spray and insisted on them using it).  The house was kind of dusty and cobwebby and had resorted to its old smell from before we moved in.  (All of you who have ever been to my house, PLEASE tell me it didn't smell like that while we were living there?!?!?!)  And the whole thing was kind of sad.  Once Craig was able to join us, we did spend a few minutes sharing our favorite memory of the house, which was very nice until my neighbor popped in to say Hi.  (I love my neighbor and was very happy to see her again, but I wish she could have given us just five more minutes first.)  And by the time she was done gabbing, we needed to leave, so we didn't really get to finish or take a picture like I'd wanted to do.

To make matters worse, most of the people I had hoped to see in Manassas either weren't around or were busy, so I only managed to see one friend while we were there (but I sure was excited to see her, even if it was only for a few minutes!).

We did get to eat at Cafe Rio.  And on the way in to town, we stopped at the Moo-Thru.  So it's not like it was a bad trip.  It just wasn't quite the glorious-if-slightly-melancholy homecoming I'd been envisioning.

They say that you can never go home again, and it's true, I'm afraid.  As we were preparing to leave, I kept telling people that we didn't really need to say good-bye because we'd be back to visit.  And we have been back to visit, but it never is quite the same.  I was fooling myself when I said that.

My home is in Charlottesville now, even if a chunk of my heart will always be in Manassas.

Fortunately, I really do love Charlottesville, and more so each day.  We live in such a beautiful place.  So while I will always have very fond memories of Manassas, I am very happy here. 

This is a panorama I took from the top of Carter Mountain, a lovely orchard and farm near our house.  I think that the houses you can make out in the center are probably part of the housing development where we live, so you get the general idea of my neighborhood!

Of Note

-Good intentions will get you one pound off.  Unfortunately, good intentions seem to be about all I got in the exercise department right now.  I went running that one time, and then Camille keeps waking up at 5am.  And we keep going to bed at midnight.  And I just don't think I can be a decent mom on that little sleep.  I have started doing these little 7-minute workouts (four days in a row-- woot!) so that's better than nothing.  And I have cut back on the snacking, although I still have a long way to go there...  Baby steps?

-Speaking of my parenting skills, I feel like God keeps upping the ante on me.  Two weeks ago it hit me that *maybe* I shouldn't be annoyed every time my kids want to talk to me and was working on that, and feeling pretty good about the progress I was making by not yelling and screaming about everything.  So then, I get asked to teach Relief Society this coming week, and the lesson is all about being a good parent, with lots of suggestions that I need to start doing.  (And they're good ones, too, so I can't even shrug them off!)  And if that wasn't bad enough, I wound up watching Inside Out twice and it was really hitting me how quickly kids grow up and how I need to be better about enjoying the moment and then I realized that, at close to 9 years old, Bentley is halfway done with his time living at home before he'll head off to college!  How completely freaky is that???  So I'm trying even harder.  I'm trying to enjoy my kids and talk to them and teach them and be the Mom I always assumed I would be.  Before life got in the way and I got busy and tired and stressed out and grumpy.

I like this picture of Colton hanging out with my Dad

-To that end, yesterday we were planning on going to the library, but when we drove by this awesome park, we changed our plans and went there instead.  The kids had a blast and we can't wait to go back!  It was so fun to find a park where the playground equipment didn't look just like the playground equipment at every other park!

-Still working on getting our house in Manassas sold.  Everything was going smoothly-- even the home inspection didn't turn much up!-- until the appraisal.  Apparently the woman hired to appraise the house knows absolutely nothing about homes, fair market value, or anything.  And she appraised it for less than we were getting.  (Just to give you an example, she thought the tile Craig had just put in was laminate.  She said, "When I tapped my camera on it, it didn't feel like tile."  'Cuz, you know, the good old camera tap is the standard for these things...)  Anyway, after much debate and a lot of angry ranting on our part, we finally just took the lower price rather than listing the house again.  But we're still pretty upset about the whole thing.  It's infuriating when someone so stupid and inconsequential has so much control over you and there's no way to appeal or change it.

-We DID finally manage to close on our house here in Charlottesville, so that was good to finally get checked off the list.  This was also infuriating, since the bank kept saying we'd close "in a few days" and then not being able to.  I don't understand what all these underwriters are doing and why it's so hard for them to actually do their job?  Isn't this all they do???  How are they so bad at it?

Here's a cute picture of Camille to counteract my frustrations

-Colton is figuring out how to open doors.  I feel like this is one of those developments where as a parent you just sort of stare in horror at your world falling down around you.  Obviously, he needed to figure this out eventually but hoo boy, it's gonna make my life more complicated!

Here Colton is reading a children's version of the Book of Mormon.  He asked for it by saying, "More more Jesus"

-For her birthday (back in February) Kendra got a gift certificate for live butterflies!  We were waiting until the weather was warm to order them, and then when we found out we were moving, that got pushed back again.  I was delighted when Kendra knew right where her gift certificate was so we were finally able to order them!  They came as caterpillars and turned into chrysalises almost immediately.  One of them failed to attach to the ceiling of their cup, so we didn't think that one would make it.  But we were delighted when it did!  She ended up with five beautiful butterflies, which we released just a few days ago!

Painted Lady

Apparently these are the most social of butterflies, and the most likely to land on your hand or shirt!

-Colton also is doing all sorts of adorable things these days: he gallops slightly sideways from room to room; if he's feeling shy he'll suddenly slouch over in the worst posture ever (we picture him asking some girl to the prom this way and die laughing at the idea of it)...  And he's continuously building up his vocabulary.  His recent acquisitions are down and up, and he'll hold toys up and down and yell about where they are, and occasionally make them fly and fall down.  It's fun-- and noisy!-- to see him developing.

Very sleepy Colton on our way home from swimming in a nearby lake.  Love that look on his face...!

-The big kids are all registered for school, and I can hardly believe it starts in about two weeks!  This summer has been the weirdest ever, with the move and Craig's new job.  It's felt long and short all at the same time, and while part of me is relieved to have them back in school (and for them to finally ride a bus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I'm always sad to see summer end...

-I'm still trying to figure out what to do with Ryder for preschool.  There are a couple co-op preschool groups in the church here, but they both have younger kids (one group is 3-year-olds, the other group is 2-year-olds), so that seems a little silly for Ryder, since he'll be 5 in November.  I should probably just sign him up for a real preschool, but I hate to do that until I have a better idea what our finances are-- what Craig's take-home pay will be, how much we're spending on groceries here, what our house payments really will be...  All that stuff.  I hate to commit another few hundred dollars a month without that information...  Can you sign up for preschool late?

Ryder plays so nicely with Camille!

-I'm also getting really frustrated with how I have to do everything at least twice for it to actually be done.  I put something in the diaper bag, and then in the process of picking up the diaper bag, that thing gets caught on the straps and falls back out again.  I throw something in the garbage and miss.  I call and cancel our garbage service in Manassas and then get a bill a month later for the same payment I already made.  I spend 20 minutes looking for a receipt so I can return something to Target, I get there and somehow managed to not bring the receipt...  We buy new doorknobs for the house, realize they're not the keyed the same, so we have to bring them back and have them re-keyed.  But when we bring them back we don't have all of them so we still need to return two more...    And in the middle of all this, Craig gets a flat tire so he takes my car so I'm stuck at home for the day...  This stuff just kind of kills my soul.  I know none of it is a very big deal, but it grinds me down in a very bad way.  Everything is just a little too far away, and Craig is just too busy, and we have a few too many kids to do things like this easily, so then when we have to do it all TWICE...  That's when I have to be really careful and not start taking my frustrations out on the people around me.  (Sorry, Craig.  Sorry, kids...)

Better add some more cute pictures to help me calm down...

Much better...!

-After finally getting to cook a few meals at home, I have concluded that I LOVE my kitchen.  Love, love, LOVE it.  It's not very big, which I'm sure to some people would be a hit against it, but I think it is perfect.  Everything is close by, so I can grab whatever I need quickly.  But there's plenty of counter space, so I never feel like I don't have room for whatever I'm doing.  It's perfect for me.  Cooking in it (and even cleaning up and putting everything in it's place) makes me so happy.  The only thing I didn't especially love was the way the silverware basket in the dishwasher was attached to the door.  It never worked very well.  And then I figured out that it could also attach to the end of the lower rack!  So now that's perfect, too.  And I felt like a genius for figuring it out.  So that was great.

Yeah, I got a couple degrees from college...

That's everything I can think of for now!

Mostly Moved In

I just said that it was helpful having Tracy here.  And it really was!  She was great for holding Camille so we could hang pictures (and doing a little bit of arbitrating, since it's the only thing Craig and I can NEVER agree on) and so I could finally unpack her (Camille's) room.  Tracy also stayed home and watched the four big kids while I took Camille with me and drove to Ikea (which is now two hours away!) to get a table and chairs for our breakfast nook and a couple kallaxes for the family room.  I don't know when I ever could have found the time for that without Tracy's help, so that was wonderful.  And everyone at Ikea was great about helping me with the heavy stuff.  It turns out it's hard to lift things when you've got a baby strapped to your chest!


Here's what our family room and breakfast nook look like with the Ikea stuff!

The panorama tends to make this look bigger (and less square) than the room really is, but you get the idea...  (This might actually be worth clicking on so you can really see everything.)  See both the big and little kallaxes?

I love all the windows and trees!  What a lovely way for the kids to start out the day!

So we're pretty much moved in now.  Yeah, we've got a few boxes left, but nothing we care too much about.  At some point, I'd like to buy a couch for our living room, but if it took us a few years to get around to doing that, I wouldn't care.  I feel like all we've done is spend money these last couple months and I would like to stop doing that now.  And my bank account agrees with that idea, too.

While my parents were here, I took care of two more tasks that I was having a hard time doing with all five kids: I got Bentley and Kendra registered at their new school, and I got myself a library card!  These are VERY IMPORTANT things.  I also learned that the library validates parking, which is helpful since there isn't much street parking nearby.

I'm slowly learning the ropes around here.  And I'm really loving our new home!

Accountability

We moved about five weeks ago, and have had a steady stream of visitors since then.  My sister Tracy came to help out the weekend we moved.  Then my parents stopped in a few days later as they headed to Europe on one of those river cruises.  Then Tracy was close by for three weeks, working on a farm, so we convinced her to pop in for a few of those weekends, which we loved (and which was super helpful).  And then my parents were back, on their way home from their cruise.  And then Craig's brother and his family got to come and visit for a few days!

So, yes, we've been feeling quite loved and popular, which is nice.

Except it's also extremely bad  . . .  for my weight.

Because every time we have company, I feel the need to eat lots of desserts with them and go out to dinner and cook anything I can think of to show off (hint: this usually involves lots of cream cheese)...  And even before we moved, we'd been eating a pretty steady diet of pizza, Chick-fil-A and ice cream (and any other comfort food imaginable) while Craig re-did the kitchen and we tried to keep the house spotless and pack.

So yes, I'm probably the fattest I've ever been without being pregnant or recently post-baby.  And that is not such a lovely thing.  I sort of hate it.

So after we were done waving good-bye to Craig's family last night, it hit me that it was finally time to start trying to be healthy again.  Camille sleeps through the night regularly enough that I should be able to get up early and get some exercise in.  And while I thought it made the most sense to start a new thing like that on a Monday, in a burst of energy and good intentions I decided to just jump into the fray this morning.

So I went running!

Well, walking.  With a little bit of very slow jogging in between the walking.  So it was a pretty laughable start, but as my friend Vangie would tell me, we all gotta start somewhere.  And it was cool and lovely outside and I even managed to catch the sunrise, so it was a perfect way to begin.

And then I thought-- well, maybe if I blog about this, I'll manage to actually keep doing it.  Don't worry-- I won't report back on every little run I go on.  But if I notice myself slendering up, I might have to get excited and talk about it here.

My other line of attack is to change how I eat.  I don't think I can handle doing anything as extreme as the Fuhrmann plan right now, so I'm not exactly eating super healthy.  But as badly as I've been eating, I think if I just cut out all the snacking, extra desserts, and maybe even my addiction to chocolate milk, that would be a huge improvement.  If I added some salad and fruit into the mix, so much the better.  And then maybe I can ease back into cooking healthier dinners or eating an apple for breakfast instead of a bowl of cereal. 

So there.  It's blogged.  I'm going to work on being healthier.  I told you, so now I have to do it.

Let it be thus!

Plagiarizing

My sweet friend Juliana wrote a beautiful blog post about my Grandma's 100th birthday.  Since her blog is private and you can't just click on it easily, I'm going to copy and paste what she wrote (and her pictures!) onto my own blog, too.  Juliana has spent WAY more time with my Grandma in the last 10 years than I have, and it was really wonderful to read all the nice things she had to say about my Grandmother.  I'll write some of my own thoughts in a separate blog post later, but I want what Juliana wrote recorded here, too!  (Sorry, Juliana-- I hope what I'm doing is okay with you???)


Here are Juliana's words:


Helen Bentley has been a sweet grandma to me throughout my entire life. And it was a sweet honor to celebrate her 100th birthday over Easter weekend in Seattle.

Here are a few of my favorite Helen Bentley memories (with pictures of her party too):

two cakes! and many, many bouquets of flowers. 

• Helen used to work at the front desk of my dentist office (Dr Thomas). I remember my mom would always schedule our dentist appointments for days/shifts that Helen was working, just so we could visit her when we came for our appointments. (Plus, the other front desk lady Claudia always seemed mean.)

• Until I was in college, Helen lived in the Greenwood Ward in Shoreline, which meant she was in our stake at church. It was always fun to see her at stake conference, and I grew up knowing that she had mutual friends/church acquaintances with my parents. I think this overlap helped me realize that she was more than just a nice grandma, but she actually had her own life.

• I remember visiting her condo in Shoreline with my mom semi-regularly, and her floors were always immaculate. It seemed like she vacuumed every day! Especially as a little girl, how someone could keep their house spotless always seemed incredible.

Emi loved all the catered food and treats.
Emi also loved going on walks with Jeff  and playing with the other Bentley babies.

• Helen Bentley came to my baptism and gifted me the most beautiful little teddy bear in a fancy peach dress. I remember opening the bear on the drive home from the baptism (even though I think I was supposed to wait) and being so excited that Helen gave me a gift I actually wanted. (In contrast to some of my other baptismal gifts that felt boring to me - like scripture quotes.) This teddy bear was on display in my bedroom until I got married, and now is packed safely away in a box full of my favorite things.

• When I was in high school, my dad would visit Helen to check on her toilets, plumbing and any other household details, as a friendly check-in. My dad would always bring me along, to both practice my own fix-it skills, and also for a chance to visit with our favorite 90 year old.

• Nearly every Thanksgiving morning growing up, the four of us Hogan’s would wake up early, get ready, and drive through Shoreline to pick up Helen Bentley. Then drive to the Seattle-Bainbridge Ferry for a weekend of Hogan-Bentley festivities. My mom always joked that we had the best end of the Thankgiving responsibilities - all we had to bring was homemade pies and Grandma Helen!

• I remember when Helen was in her 80’s and my mom gushing her how she didn’t look a day older than 60. In my mind I kept wondering, how is that a nice thing to say, 60 is still so old?!

I love this picture!
It is crowded, but I love how Helen is surrounded by laughing family
and she is just sitting and soaking it all in.

• Helen often shopped at Nordstom and bought the Bentley girls the fanciest scarfs and holiday presents. The summer before I went to college, Helen bought me a set of fancy gold and silver earrings and wrote me the nicest note. (I still have them both safe, tucked away with the baptism teddy bear.)

• When Helen was in her 90’s, she had a memory-driving fiasco and got lost in Woodinville. My parents drove out to save her and her car, and I remember my mom explaining how Helen calmed right down as soon as she saw my dad and he started talking and joking with her.

• Helen, Patrice and my mom would go shopping at Alderwood Mall together, and Helen would love to buy her pants at Coldwater Creek. She always dressed so classy.

• I remember Helen was so excited for my wedding, she bought Jeff and I the fanciest gift, and made a sassy “well of course she is” comment when my mom told her I was getting married in the Seattle Temple.

Emi holds her own glittery 100 year glasses

a small group with our 100 glasses on

• Helen loved my mom fiercely. When the Bentleys arrived to my mom’s funeral, Helen was sobbing. She was dressed in black and looked as classy as ever, but her tight hug and her raw tears broke (and validated) my heart in a powerful way. Even after witnessing the sorrow and heartbreak of life for 95 years, she still had capacity to deeply mourn and love my mother.

• Three summers ago, Helen fell and broke her hip. The replacement surgery and rehab moved her out of her assisted living home and into a facility closer to my dad’s house. For several weeks over the summer, I visited Helen in the evenings. One of my favorite nights was when we watched the opening ceremonies of the Olympics together and she laughed at how frumpy and old the Queen of England was looking. Ha!

• During those same summer visits, Helen’s regular pants (the black ones from Coldwater Creek) got misplaced in the laundry room. It was suggested that she could wear hospital scrubs - and Helen was both scoffing and insulted about that suggestion for days! (Thankfully, it felt like a glimpse of inspiration that I remembered Helen’s favorite pants and could help find them.)

with Rachael and Ian after the party

• Two summers ago, Kat, Emi and I visited Bainbridge Island for a day trip. We had lunch and ice cream with Patrice, and visited Helen in the afternoon. Helen was so captivated with baby Emi, and remembered exactly who Kat was, including details about her family and parents. Such a sharp mind and sweet heart for age 98!

• During that same visit to Bainbridge Island, Helen asked me why I wasn’t visiting her as often as I had the summer before (when she was in the rehab facility). I explained that Jeff and I moved to Connecticut and were living back East. Without missing a beat, Helen sassily replied “oh I know that, but why don’t you come by anymore?”.

Helen and me

Helen’s 100th birthday party was a beautiful success! The party was hosted on Bainbridge Island, and both her children, and all her grandchildren and great grandchildren were able to come! Helen’s mind is still sharp, and it was so sweet to see her face light up when her friend and family walked into the room. I don’t think I’ve ever had a conversation with Helen where she didn’t pay me at least one compliment, and ask me several questions about my own life. She is absolutely gracious, and there is no question why she is so well loved. I can’t imagine my life without Helen Bentley on my team of favorite people, and it was so sweet to be a part of her celebration.

*    *     *     *     *

Okay, me again. Wasn't that a sweet tribute from Juliana? I will get around to writing about my Grandma, also, but I don't know that I can even add much to what Juliana already wrote! Thanks for letting me steal this, Juliana!

And P.S. Isn't Emi the cutest little girl ever??? I'm desperate to make sure that she and Colton end up marrying each other...

Getting Settled

I have very slowly been unpacking.  And by "unpacking," what I really mean is, "moving boxes into the room where they should go, and then just leaving them there."  I seem to be having a difficult time getting past that.  In my defense, though, there's usually a good reason for it.  In my room, the unpacked boxes are mostly full of Craig's stuff.  And most of it should probably be thrown away.  But he doesn't have time for unpacking, and I'm not throwing away his stuff without his permission, so it's just sitting there.

In Camille's room, I could unpack more, except she's always either a) asleep in her room or b) awake and demanding that I hold her.  To be in her room NOT holding her means she is screaming.  So those boxes will get unpacked the next time someone is visiting who wants to hold her while I unpack.  (Any takers?)  And the many many boxes of toys...  Well, sometimes I open a box and let the kids play with them.  And then they mostly just throw them all over the house and I am reminded of why I'm planning on selling all of them at the HOA's Fall Yard sale.  Then I throw them all back in the box (or make the kids do it, since they made the mess) and forget about them for a little longer.


But, to prove that I was making progress, I did manage to snap this picture the other day:

That's my car, actually parked INSIDE my garage!  I haven't managed to pull it into the garage since then, but it still makes me happy that I did it at all!  Progress, any way I can manage it...

Other than unpacking, it's been weird trying to fill my time.  I've never had so much time with all the kids and no Craig before.  If they're out of school, he always has been, too.  So this has been an adjustment.  I've switched to doing as much of my grocery shopping as possible at night-- it's hard enough to find everything you're looking for in a new store WITHOUT five little people interrupting you non-stop.  And I'm also trying to enjoy the unstructured time that we have.  Yesterday I decided to make a lasagne TOTALLY from scratch-- I even made the sauce, something I've never done before.  It wasn't even all that hard, and it was the best lasagne I've ever had.  (Thank you, Our Best Bites!)  Because, when you have absolutely nothing planned for the day, why not make your own sauce?

And about once a week or so, I'm trying to pull Bentley and Kendra aside for a little "Mommy School" time.  This is pretty short and laid back-- I just pick a topic and we talk about it.  So far we've discussed World War I and II, how to make movies, and dinosaurs.  I think next I might talk about Van Gogh, since kids are always fascinated by him.  Unless I decide to talk about something else instead.  It was Craig's idea that we do this, but I love that he suggested it, as it is something I always pictured myself doing with my kids, but then never got around to.

In fact, I realized this last week that I needed to step back and fix my parenting in a big way.  With all the craziness of the last couple months, I'd become about the grouchiest mom ever-- one of those moms who seems to be constantly snapping at her kids to just leave her alone and to stop making messes.  I felt kind of justified in my terrible attitude, but it quickly turned from a coping mechanism to just who I was.  And I didn't like that.  So I'm working on being more patient and turning back into a person who actually enjoys her kids, instead of someone who just tries to get away from them. 

So that, like so many other things in life, is a work in progress.

I'm hoping that eventually I can have some friends around here, too.  Everyone has been very friendly at church and in the neighborhood, but I seem to have forgotten how to take that next step and become actual friends...  I was filling out the school registration forms, and it occurred to me that I didn't know a single person who I could put down as an emergency contact here.   And then I sort of wanted to cry...

So yes, unpacking, parenting, meeting new people...  All works in progress.



Moving is hard.  {Sigh.}

Crazy Ryder

I took this video back in November when we went to South Carolina to spend Thanksgiving with Craig's family.  It was a wonderful holiday, but Ryder was a bit over-tired throughout (it's always hard for my kids to adjust to sleeping in a different bed than their own).  And one evening, as we were getting ready to eat dinner, I noticed Ryder performing these "acrobatics" across the way.  I think he'd been doing this for about five minutes before we finally began recording it.  And he continued long after the camera was turned off.

This is how Ryder acts when he's beyond tired:

Let's hope he never starts drinking.  I can't even imagine what that would look like...

Under Contract

We have a ratified contract on the house! 

Did I ever share its listing here?  I don't think I did, so I'm going to fix that right now.  Tadaa!  I was very pleased with how the picture turned out, especially considering that I just about worked my fingers to the bone trying to get it perfectly clean.  I kept finding dirt in places I never would have thought of.  And much thanks also goes to my in-laws who came and put in many hours helping us clean-- my mother-in-law washed all the windows and I immediately regretted all the years I HADN'T been washing them, because looking through them was so much sparkly-cleaner than I could have imagined!  Seriously, my goal now is to actually wash my windows once a year.  Who knew that made such a difference???

I had heard lots of horror stories about people selling their homes without an agent and using terrible pictures.  And, we'd seen our fair share of terrible pictures when we were sorting through all the foreclosures before we bought our house!  I really wanted our home to NOT look like that.  And I thought the pictures turned out beautifully, so that was a relief.  Also, I think moving half our furniture out of the house was a good idea, even if it was a huge hassle.

Anyway, our house was listed on June 3rd, and then we've had open houses every Sunday since, plus the times when someone was coming and I'd have to frantically tidy up every little thing and take out the trash and make ourselves scarce, regardless of who was napping (or who needed one)...  It was such a relief to move out and not have to play that game any more! 

 We finally got one fairly low offer on the 26th, and had slowly been negotiating with that, and then got a better offer on July 3rd, so we just took that one.  (The first offer was from another real estate agent buying the house for his daughter, and he struck us as being a big pain to work with.  I can't even imagine how awful he would have been over the home inspection!)

So, yes, we have a contract.  I've seen lots of contracts fall through, so I'm not celebrating just yet.  But if this all goes down how it ought to, then I will be very happy with how it all went...  For now, though, we have a bit of waiting to do.

Chicken News

So we brought our chickens to our new place even though the HOA rules specifically prohibit keeping poultry.  We figured they're pretty quiet, and the coop will be located down the hill from our house, so not that many people would even see them, right?

We forgot the fact that we have children and where there are children, there are no secrets.  Especially in this neighborhood, where all the kids run around and play at each other's houses, like we're back in the 1950s or something (which is the coolest thing ever and one of my favorite things about our new place, actually).  Our very first day here, Bentley announced to his new friend that we had chickens.  This friend reported this to his mother, who said, "Chickens are illegal!" which was promptly reported back to Bentley.  And this mom is on the board of the HOA.  It turns out most of the moms in the neighborhood are on the board.

We figured we were screwed and prepared for the worst.

But then... nothing happened.  We weren't celebrating yet or anything-- I figure these things take time-- but honestly our biggest concern was a cat that was getting interested in our back yard.  Even more concerning was when I told Bentley to shoo it away, and watched as Bentley began chasing after it with a shovel!  I put a stop to that pretty quickly.  It's one thing to protect your chickens, it's a whole 'nother thing to go around killing the neighbor's cats!  We came up with the better solution of squirting water at the cat if it ventured into our backyard.  It quickly learned its' lesson.

So a week goes by, and as Craig is rounding up the kids for dinner one night, this same on-the-HOA-board Mom comes out to speak with Craig.  She begins by saying, "I'm not the one who turned you in, by the way!  I don't mind if you have chickens!  I just want this to be a fun neighborhood!"  Craig quickly reassured her that we hadn't thought any such thing about her, but he was pretty confused until she asked, "So what happened?"

"Uhhhh...  Nothing?" Craig replied, "No one's said anything about the chickens so far..."

It took a few more minutes for them to figure out that Kendra had told a different mom that we would need to get rid of our chickens because of this woman.  And the other mom had passed the story on to her.

Clearly we need to stop talking about anything in front of our children.

I saw this same mom at the pool on the 4th of July and quickly apologized for whatever gossip my children were spreading around the neighborhood and thanked her for being so gracious about everything.  I hope after all this we can all still get along.

And maybe even keep the chickens, too!

Not attacking any more cats with shovels would probably be a step in the right direction...

Is a Picture Still Worth a Thousand Words?

In lieu of actually blogging, I'm just going to share this picture, because I love it so much:

Of all her siblings, Colton loves Camille the best.