Hobnobbing with Real Bloggers (not really)

I recently finished reading Let's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson, known on her blog as The Bloggess (tagline: Like Mother Theresa, Only Better).  She's a super funny lady, but I should warn you that she is in no way Mormon.  Her favorite word is probably the f-word (followed closely by "vagina" and "taxidermy," although those three are rarely used together, thank goodness!), and she talks about drinking, doing drugs, and once giving herself a concussion when trying to arch her back like a porn star during sex.  So, um, don't read her book unless you're prepared for all that.

But, having said all that, can I just add that you really should read her book because she will make you laugh.  So hard.  But it's more than that.  She's quirky and strange, but she's also open and honest and vulnerable.  And at times, even insightful.  She's like a female, Texas-raised, edgy version of Dave Barry, if you can imagine such a thing.  (And that's high praise, in my book.)

Anyway, because of her combination of edgy and vulnerable, I feel this weirdly protective loyalty towards her.  I worry that she's exactly the sort of person who people like me would write off at the first f-word, without ever realizing how great she is.  Or, in this day of people being so mean to each other, that these people might tell her that, or try to make her feel bad for not being who she isn't.  This worried me enough that I decided to write her an email.  This is what I said:

Hi, Jenny,

I don't usually send emails to the authors of books that I read.  But this time I have to.  I want you to know that I am about as conservative as they come-- both politically and socially and probably any other way you could define it.  I don't swear or drink or do drugs.  And I'm Mormon, so I've never done any of that stuff.  And my husband might even be more conservative than I am.

And man, I loved your book so much.  I laughed so hard and was constantly reading entire paragraphs to my husband or my sister or anyone who was around.

But that's not why I'm emailing you.

I'm emailing you because last night, after I finished reading your book, I was flipping through it trying to explain your (brilliant) humor to my husband, and I finally just handed it over so he could read the whole cow vagina story for himself.  And I have NEVER seen him laugh so hard.  He turned all red and literally had tears streaming down his face and neck.  He was laughing so hard he was having a hard time seeing the words on the page.  It was fabulous watching him laugh like that, it made me so happy.
 
I just wanted you to know that even weird religious and conservative people love you.  And if anyone says otherwise, they're dumb and probably don't have a sense of humor.  (And shouldn't be telling you anyway, because that's so rude.  Didn't their mothers teach them any manners?)
 
I hope you're having a great day because you deserve great days.  And if you're not, I hope it got better knowing how much I loved watching my husband laugh until he cried.

Alanna


And here's the COOLEST THING EVER-- she wrote back to me!!!!!  This is what The Bloggess said to me:

I am sending such love to you and your husband right now.  You both TOTALLY ROCK!

  

I was giddy and star struck after that.  I love this lady.  Go read her book, right now.  Just skip over the swear words.