Welcome, London!

I am super late on this post, but on March 27th, my baby sister Rachael, gave birth to her first baby girl!!!  London Christine Aveytua arrived after a mere 1.5 hours of hospital labor (and a few days of very inconsistent contractions) weighing in at a delicate 7 lbs 10 oz.  Seriously, that's two pounds lighter than Camille at birth!!!

She came so easily, she decided she had to create a little bit of drama by letting her oxygen levels dip just enough that the doctors decided to send her to a children's hospital in Akron just to make sure everything was okay.  So she got to ride in an ambulance for a couple hours while mommy and daddy very nervously followed behind (apparently no one thought it was a good idea for Rachael to ride in a bumpy ambulance less than 24 hours postpartum).  Once they could check her out there they decided she was just fine, so that was a huge relief, and she got to go home the next day.  Everyone was very excited to have mommy and daddy and baby home!

She got to come home on her big brother Clayton's second birthday.  He had been less than thrilled about this birthday gift (when he first met her in the hospital, he yelled "Keep her!" while trying to push her away), but Nolan and Harrison seem delighted with their baby sister especially Harrison, who declared, "Clayton has Nolan to watch over him, but I get London!"  And Clayton warmed up to her very quickly after they were all home (and he got a big birthday celebration the next day)!

And we're all just thrilled to have another adorable niece in the family!

And I'm very impressed with Rachael's ability to give her kids themed names that aren't annoying!  Well done, Rocky!

Random April (and March) Stuff

My choir has been hard at work learning Rachmaninoff's All-Night Vigil for our concert at the end of the month.  I'm getting so much better at sight-reading music and harmonizing below the 1st sopranos and singing in Russian.  And yet, I feel like it's not even close to enough for what this work requires-- I am going to be putting in some serious extra hours very soon.  As Michael put it, "After this, everything will seem easy!"

We participated in a small concert a couple weeks ago at a local winery-- we sang with the University Singers (who will be joining us for the upcoming concert as well, meaning we'll have 160 voices all blending in a church with gorgeous acoustics!).  Charlottesville Ballet also performed, and there were soloists from Charlottesville Opera, so that was pretty awesome.  Unfortunately, it was also FREEZING.  The temperature didn't look too bad if you just checked the weather, but the wind was just cutting through everything.  By the time we walked off the stage, my toes were going numb.  I wanted to stick around and listen to everything else, but the heater in my car (and the promise of pizza at home with my family) was too tempting.

We had a solo dancer during one of our songs, so that was cool, although I wish I could have watched her more!  If only I'd memorized the Russian...

It was a beautiful venue and a beautiful day, if it hadn't been so cold!!!

We had spring break the first week of April.  We weren't doing much, since we'd just gone on our cruise, but I did use the extra time to get Colton an EKG.  All my children seem to have sinus arrhythmia, which sounds scary but is apparently no big deal?  Anyway, my pediatrician wanted Colton's checked out, just to be sure.  It's always so weird for me to do things I'm unfamiliar with, but once the doctor had sent in the order, all we had to do was show up at the hospital and ask for an EKG!  Doesn't that seem like the kind of thing you'd need an appointment for?

But that was exactly how it went!  The only glitch was that the nurse accidentally didn't save the images, so right as we were getting in the car, she called me and asked if I could come back so she could do it once more.  The good thing about that was that I hadn't taken any pictures, so now I had the chance to rectify that.

I sent these pictures to Craig and he wrote back, "Why does everyone want to attach wires to Colton all the time???"  He concluded that he must be a cyborg, which Colton thought was awesome.  (Craig isn't wrong.  This really does seem to be a thing with Colton.) (And yes, the nurse confirmed that Colton has a sinus arrhythmia which is absolutely nothing to worry about.  Whew!  I wasn't particularly worried-- mostly because it's not in my nature to worry too much until I absolutely have to-- but as we were walking into the hospital Colton asked me what would happen if there was something wrong with his heart, and my own heart nearly broke as I realized that just because I was acting like this was no big deal didn't mean that my sensitive little guy hadn't picked up on the fact that it could be a big deal.)

Later in the day, Adam and I took the kids hiking at Walnut Creek!  We didn't take a group photo this time, but I did snap these fun shots:

I think this was my 4th time hiking here so how had I never noticed this totally creepy abandoned house before???  We all agreed it was scary and probably haunted.

These trees grew together and now it looks like the big one is giving the little one a hug!  Awww...!

The eastern redbuds were just starting to bloom, which always makes me happy!

A recent storm had snapped a whole bunch of trees, but it really mangled this one...!  Yipes!

After our hike, we made pizzas with Adam and then watched a movie, so that was a really fun afternoon!

And on a TOTALLY different note, I met up with Sarah for lunch and she happened to have a wig in her car that we needed to try out on me, and we ended up with this amazing picture:

It took Craig a few minutes to even realize that was me! 😂😂😂 And Bentley is telling me I shouldn't post this on my blog because it is too scary.  Sorry to end on this terrifying image!

Fundraising

The church has changed what used to be EFY (Especially For Youth) to a new program called FSY (For the Strength of Youth).  As far as I can tell, it's roughly the same, but much cheaper and they're really trying to get ALL the youth to be able to participate (whereas EFY was expensive enough and often involved traveling to a different state, so really only people who were fairly well off could have afforded it).  Obviously, I am ALL FOR these changes!  And what's even more exciting, our kids will get to attend FSY at William & Mary, so that's just super cool.  

The cost is only $75 per kid, which is insanely cheap for a week, but our ward still decided that it would cover expenses and have the kids do fundraising to pay for it.  If that means more kids can participate AND my kids will have a greater sense of ownership over their time there (or a sense that they had to work to earn it), then that's also great with me.  So all the youth have been working at various people's homes doing yard work to earn money.  Their first day doing this was the day that Bentley broke his arm, so Craig ended up having to bring Camille with him, since we were still at the hospital.  They had Ryder helping using a wood chopper, so I'm very thankful we didn't end up with TWO trips to the ER that day!

Look at that hard-working girl!

(Kendra and Colton had activities at the church, and we were very fortunate that the Herrings were willing to take them and bring them home for us!)

Their next project involved clearing away trees and brush that some people had had cut down and burned, clearing more pasture for their horses.  It was dirty, hard work and I was glad I didn't have to help out!  Craig made Bentley come along thinking he could blow leaves or something, but that ended up not being the case.  But hopefully he gets points for showing up?  And the people bought them all pizza when they were done, so that was nice!

And speaking of making money, I went to work that night at another wedding!  (First I've done in several months-- there aren't many weddings in the winter, and I was usually too busy with our own family stuff to make it to even those few!)  This was the WINDIEST wedding I've ever seen, but luckily enough, the bride's dress moved very beautifully in the wind, so while everyone was very cold, at least the bride looked lovely!  I only bothered taking pictures of this one thing I helped set up which turned out even cuter than I would have guessed:

Seriously, how cute is this???

Unfortunately, I didn't get to eat any.  But I did get a slice of wedding cake (with passionfruit curd-- so delicious!), so I can't complain too much.  And I was doubly delighted when I got paid and realized Adam had given me a raise!  Happy day!

While we were waiting for our dinner, the photo booth guy said we could come and take pictures, since the guests weren't there yet, so we did!  There's Brittany, me and Adam having a blast!

And here's one more day of fundraising, just so you can see that Kendra is also working hard!

Ironically, this is SO MUCH more yard work than we ever make our kids do around our home!

The Perils of Kickball

After a week with Zevi, I was really looking forward to a week with the kids in school.  So, of course, Camille didn't feel well on Monday and stayed home.  (She wasn't really sick.  But if they complain about anything I feel like I should probably keep them home.  It's very annoying.)  And then on Tuesday, around 1:30 I got a call from the school nurse at Monticello High School telling me that Bentley had fallen on his arm playing kickball.  I was going to just brush her off, but she went on to say that when he tried to walk to the nurse's station, he fainted.  Apparently as he was passing out, he tried to lean against a brick wall, only to slide down the wall with his face against like a cheese grater.  Not good.

I hurried to the school to pick him up, the nurse and PE teacher insisted on walking him out to my car in case he got woozy again.  And I was SHOCKED to see him.  He looked like this:

Yikes?!?!!?

I'd made an appointment with a pediatrician while I waited in the car for him, so we pretty much went straight there (I did leave a note for the little kids, who were due to get off the bus very soon).  She looked at his arm, put him in a sling, gave him a bunch of ibuprofen, and recommended I take him to the emergency room.  She said in growing children, you don't want to mess around with elbow joints, and that was the fastest way to get an orthopedic doctor to look at it.

I can admit this now without cursing my luck: I had never been to the ER before!!!  Going new places always gets me a bit anxious, and it's even harder if I know it will be difficult to park the van (like, say, in the UVA Hospital parking garage, where the ceiling is too low), so this was slightly terrifying to me, but there was nothing to it but to drive there and hope I could figure everything out.  We pulled into the ER entrance and they took Bentley and pointed me to where there was oversize vehicle parking in a different garage.  It was all easy peasy.  I quickly joined Bentley and we got him checked him.  Everything was fairly quick-- we got checked in, and then checked in again in the peds wing.  They put him in a room and had a doctor look at his arm.  They took x-rays.  The doctor came back and explained that she could see a tiny crack in his bone so we should have an orthopedist look at it and then... nothing.  We ended up waiting nearly two hours for the orthopedist to finally show up (and even after all that, we just got a resident).  So that was frustrating then, especially because Bentley was hungry and I didn't want him to pass out again!  (Also, everyone was very confused that we were there for a broken arm when his face was so obviously banged up.  I was sort of glad this had happened at school so I wasn't suspect or anything...)

The resident was very helpful, though.  He showed us the x-ray and explained that Bentley had a growth plate that was displaced, so he'd need a splint for now while it was swollen and then he proceeded to do just that. 

This is just an image I found on the internet, but 11B is pretty much exactly what Bentley's x-ray looked like: that tiny bump on the left side is slightly displaced and not right.

See how swollen it is underneath?

By the time we finally left, we'd been there for 4 hours.  Ugh.  Let's not do that again, okay?  Bentley was starving so we hit Five Guys on our way home.

We went back a week later and a doctor (a legit doctor this time!) put a real cast on it.  She said he'll only have to wear it for two more weeks, so that's not bad.  It's driving Bentley crazy, since he can't bend his arm at all now (watching him try to scratch his head or move his hair off his forehead is hilarious), but honestly, it could have been so much worse.

Getting casted up.  We weren't sure what they would do, but once I realized we were sitting waiting in the Casting Room I figure it out.  (I should have been a doctor!)

At least he got a much more comfortable sling!

But the best part was on Friday when Bentley passed the test to get his learner's permit (!!!) and his face is all beat up for his picture!  What are the odds of those two things happening the same week???

Anyway, in another moment of amazing irony, we realized that Bentley will get his cast off the same day he gets his braces off, so we'll probably shell out the $3 to get him a new picture on his permit after that!

He can still enjoy pizza!

Anyway, it's been an exciting week.  Just think-- we've never broken a bone in this family until this year, when we've had both Ryder and Bentley break stuff!  It's nuts.  But we're lucky, they've both been pretty no big deal breaks.  They both definitely could have been much worse!

Another Week with Zevi (This Time Without Catching Covid!)

After Colton's birthday, I had another week with Zevi!  Unlike the last time I watched him, this had been planned months in advance because his nanny was going to Atlanta to go house hunting.  That was all fine and good, until the schools changed their calendar and suddenly the kids didn't have school on that Friday!  I was a little worried about wrangling two extra kids all day, but fortunately Rachel was very understanding and left work early so she could get them shortly after lunch (and brought me lunch, to boot!).  So that was a relief!

Wearing Ryder's hat for St. Patrick's Day

He wouldn't wear a bib, so I figured it was easier to clean him off than his shirt!

We tried on costumes-- and there's Noah (the dragon) in the back with Colton and Camille!

We really liked jumping on the trampoline!

And he really liked these binoculars (or, as my kids call them, binoculators) which were mine when I was a kid!  Fisher-Price stuff is built to LAST.

Zevi is a delight, and we had a good time together!  But I'm not gonna lie-- watching a 2-year-old in my not-2-year-old-proof house is exhausting.  I don't think I'm cut out for that kind of work any more!  I was quite relieved when the week was over and I could get back to my routine of doing whatever I want without making sure no one is destroying my house while I do it!

Colton is 9!

Colton's birthday is the same day as the Covid shutdowns, so that 2-year mark was also his 9 year mark!  And, as we often do, we managed to spread the celebrating out over about a week and he had a wonderful time throughout!

We began the Saturday before his birthday.  That was the day we had gross icy sleet all day and also my choir concert!  So that was a fun combination!  But in spite of the terrible weather, Tom and Donna managed to make it to Charlottesville for the concert, and then we all went to Five Guys for dinner (Colton's choice, although I think Bentley may have held some persuasive powers over him to make that happen), and then Colton got to open presents:

He also chose Krispy Kreme dougnuts!

On his actual birthday I made him Dutch babies for dinner, Kendra made him a cake, and Craig frosted it.  And I wrapped his presents!

Money shot!  (Also-- I had to order that "9" candle from Amazon!  None of my grocery stores had that number!)

And then the following Saturday, Colton brought a couple friends to Jump, had pizza and a movie after (and we finished the cake from Camille's birthday that we'd frozen) so that was a delightful day for him!  (Also, Craig took him to get a much-needed haircut before his friends arrived!)

With Abel and Walker-- gotta love those red faces from jumping so much!

I swear Colton is not that short, his friends are just excessively tall!

So I think it was a good birthday, overall-- lots of presents and treats, what more could you ask for?  

Happy Birthday, Colton!!!  We sure love you!!!

And now we have officially wrapped up birthday season in the Smith household!  Whew-- I always feel like we've accomplished something when we get to this point! 😅

March Happenings

A couple Fridays ago the teachers had a teacher work day, so I made the kids all go hiking with me again!  Just for old time's sake, I grabbed Sydney and Beth, too.  We did Ragged Mountain and had a great time (except for one child who spent half the hike acting like he was going to die)(and who will not be named, but if you look in the group photo, he's the only one ominously standing in a shadow...)!

Kendra was very nice about giving Beth a piggyback ride for a bit!

This picture cracks me up

Having a good time!

I can't figure out how long this hike actually is.  The map and mile markers very clearly say it's 7 miles long, but my little odometer tracker on my phone insists I only walk 5.5 miles when I do it.  So who's right???  That seems like an awfully big discrepancy!  I'm inclined to think the answer lies somewhere in the middle, but I doubt I'll ever know.  I did learn that when you tell your kids it's only 5 or so miles and then we keep walking past the bench marked Mile 6, they get pretty angry with you.  Oops?

That night, Craig and I went out to dinner, which is one of my favorite things EVER to do.  His eyes have been getting worse since he turned 40, so as he was squinting at his phone, I suddenly realized who he was reminding me of and had to take a picture...

"However, she mistook the 'drowsy eye' alcohol warning for a 'winking eye' alcohol suggestion."

Oh, Craig makes me laugh!

On Sunday we had a neighborhood get-together, where Zevi was without a doubt my best friend there! 

Preferring a 2-year-old's company probably isn't a ringing endorsement for me, but I do like knowing that I'm at least a very good babysitter!  But then I had to leave that early so I could participate in a FaceTime baby shower for my baby sister, Rachael! 

It was very fun hanging out with all the Bentley women for a bit!

I'm still taking my turns leading FiA, and was pleased with this photo, mostly because it was finally getting light outside as we exercised (no more, since Daylight Savings) AND I managed to take a selfie without giving myself extra chins!  Success!!!  This was on a rare warm day, and it felt so great to not be wearing so many layers AND to not be swatting at mosquitoes-- we get so few days where both of those things happen!

The other day after school, Camille spent quite a bit of time making counterfeit pennies.  Should I be worried?

And Ryder got to play basketball in YMs and had the happiest time of his life, so that made me happy, too!  It was nice that the big kids let him really participate, even though he's quite a bit younger than all of them.  (I think it helped that Bentley was gone that night.)

He came home absolutely BEAMING because he'd made several shots!

Now this is super random, but it's not long enough to have its own blog post, and it's my blog, so I can talk about this here if I want to!  Ha!

Anyway, I was chatting with my sister Tracy the other day, and she told me that she would be moderating a Zoom meeting for the stake, where one of the guest speakers was the woman who coined the phrase "Well behaved women rarely make history."  DID YOU KNOW THIS CAME FROM A MORMON HARVARD PROFESSOR?!?!?!?!?  How did I not know this?

Anyway, Laurel Thatcher Ulrich.  I need to know more about her.  And I need to actually read A Midwife's Tale: the Life of Martha Ballard, and probably a bunch of her other stuff, too, but this is the one I'd heard of because we talked about a lot in my Historian's Craft class a long, long time ago (and which was taught by another brilliant professor, Jenny Pulsipher).  So much learning to do!

Expectations

So I'm going to write more about that library job that I didn't get, because it has been a ride.  I've had a lot of thoughts about it, and I'd like to try to get them down here before I forget everything.

This transition to having my kids finally-- finally!!!-- actually going to school has been a strange one for me.  For one thing, it's taken so long and started and stopped in such fits and weirdness of Covid, I felt like I could never even trust that it was truly happening or that it wouldn't suddenly be taken away in another pointless effort to flatten the curve or something.  And then, even when my kids went to school full time, 5 days a week this year, they still come home promptly at 2:45, and every week there's a teacher work day or dentist/doctor/orthodontist appointments, and on the rare week when none of those things happen, someone will invariably decide they need to come home early because of a migraine, or cough, or broken arm (to give only examples I've actually dealt with).

So even though my kids are mostly at school, it's not like I really ever clock out on being Mom.  (Which is fine!)

But, having said that, I will freely admit that I really enjoy having the house to myself for a few hours.  I enjoy the quiet and the freedom.  I enjoy being able to nap without issuing fifty warnings to everyone about the dire consequences if they wake me up.  I enjoy the fact that things stay clean if left alone.  I enjoy being able to listen to Taylor Swift and sing along without anyone complaining or just cringing in embarrassment, or practice my choir music or play the piano (I'VE BEEN PLAYING PIANO!!!).  I can shop without worrying that the kids are either fighting or watching too much tv while I'm gone.  It's really nice.

But after a few days of peace and quiet, I started to wonder if maybe I shouldn't be doing more with my life.  I mean-- I love a good nap just as much as the next person, but I don't want to look back on my life and think, Wow, I really napped.  A lot.  Did I do anything else?

So I started thinking about what I wanted to do.  And what I even could do, given the weird, unpredictable hours my kids are actually at school.  And, perhaps because a friend of mine in a different state works in a library, eventually I came to the conclusion that I would probably really enjoy working at the library.  The next day (after my nap) I began poking around on their website, and lo and behold, they were looking for a part-time employee to work at the circulation desk!  But unfortunately, the position closed at 5pm.  I frantically threw together a resume and filled out the online form before my kids came home, but my resume was pretty terrible and I didn't even have time to write a cover letter, so I didn't have a whole lot of hope for that.  And, sure enough, I didn't hear anything back at all.

A week or two later, I happened to chat with one of the library employees who I know (and who is a supervisor), and I mentioned that I'd applied for a job there.  She told me that they hire people all the time and to keep checking the website for new listings.  Sure enough, when I looked that afternoon, there was a new listing!  This time it was just for a substitute position, so possibly less hours and more flexibility, which felt like a much better fit for me.  So this time, I really worked on my resume, I wrote a cover letter, I did a better job with the on-line form.  I really TRIED.

And I heard nothing.

I was disappointed, but I tried to let it go.  What else can you do?

That was early in November.  At the end of January, I happened to see my friend at the library again, and she mentioned that they were hoping to start interviewing for that position and she was sorry it had taken them so long to get around to it.  I figured that couldn't possibly be a bad sign, and sure enough, the next week I got an email from her inviting me to come and interview!  I was so excited!  Adam and I went shopping for a professional outfit; I pored over their website to make sure I knew something about the library mission statement and such.  And-- I'm not going to try for humility here-- I felt like the interview went really well.  It was my friend and another woman asking me questions, and it almost felt like a fun gab session.  At the end, they asked me to alphabetize a bunch of books, and I'm pretty sure I got all those right, too.  (At least, I noticed, as I was getting the Christianson authors in order by first name, that one of them was actually Christiansen and alphabetized accordingly!)

So, it was a not-so-happy surprise when, within an hour of stepping off our cruise ship, I checked my email and learned I had not gotten the position.  My friend had sent a very nice email, so once I was home I wrote back and asked if there was something I could have done better in my interview or a way to improve my resume.  She wrote back immediately reassuring me that my interview had been great, but that the person they hired had library experience and so had edged me out.  So I could at least stop wondering if I'd royally screwed something up and not even realized it.  One less thing to lose sleep over.

As I've thought about the whole thing more, I genuinely think this might be for the best.  The hours for the position were all over the map, and I like to be home when my kids get home from school so I can hear about their day.  I'd been thinking that Ryder was old enough to be in charge if I wasn't home, but I hadn't considered the fact that he'll be in middle school next year, so Colton and Camille would be coming home, just the two of them.  Also, my older kids will be away for a few weeks here and there this summer, so that would have been difficult for the little kids, too.

More and more, I'm honestly not sure how people have time for jobs and are still parents.  I mean-- I know most families have both parents working, but I'm pretty sure all the moms are getting stuck doing the vast majority of the cooking and housework and household managing (all those doctors and dentist appointments and such) on top of their jobs-- how do they do it all?  How do they do it all without being resentful that they're doing everything?  I worry for these women.

But even though I've had all these thoughts, I've also wondered what's wrong with me that I don't seem to be able to get a job when everyone else clearly can.  It's hard not to feel just a little bit like a failure when you, y'know, fail at something.

And then one of my exercise friends showed us a tiktok video (of all things!) where a woman was talking about how most women are defined and judged by their relationships-- they're a good (or bad) mom, sister, wife, daughter.  And this woman was making the point that it's enough to just be YOU.  You don't have to be those other things to other people to be worthwhile.  I didn't give it much thought in the moment, but later it occurred to me that it isn't any more fair that I feel judged for not having a job.  On the news, people are constantly talking about how they need to get more women into the workforce and how terrible it is that so many women quit their jobs during the pandemic.  Is that really tragic?  If women took a good hard look at their lives and decided their jobs weren't worth it any more when their kids needed them, is that a problem?  Does society get to judge us based on whether or not we're getting a paycheck?

My answer to that, obviously, is a resounding No.  Just because I'm not getting paid to take care of my family doesn't make the work I'm doing any less valuable.  And I've always felt that I do a better job of taking care of my children than anyone else (except Craig, of course) because no one else loves them the way their parent can.  

And with that realization, I felt actual peace over the entire situation.  Everything is fine.  I'm right where I'm meant to be.  I just needed a bit of a journey to remember that.  

And I still love the library.

Trying Stuff

Since getting home, there have been a few other things we've been up to...

Craig came home from work one day and we realized we matched, even down to the blue shirts under our sweatshirts!  Maybe some day, you and your spouse can also be this in synch.  Maybe.

I got my hair cut, but the girl cutting it went shorter than I wanted.  So that's been exciting.  I don't hate it, but I think it's a bit more punk than I actually am.  And seeing other people's reactions has been hilarious.  A British woman from my choir with a truly wacky sense of style gushed over how much she loved it, and then the elderly woman I sit next to arrived and said, "Looks like you got shorn!"  So we're all over the map.  It's fine, it will grow.  (Can I complain about how much I hate the fact that the girl who did a really great job with my hair moved to an insanely expensive salon?  I mean-- good for her, I'm sure she's making loads more money!-- but I'm just not willing to shell out $125 for a haircut!  Especially since I just can't believe it would change my hair that much!)  Anyway, I've been trying stuff, with varying success.  No one liked the wet-gel look.  The troll doll look makes me laugh!  Good thing my hair grows fast!

Camille saw this craft in one of her kid magazines and found an empty toilet paper roll so she could make it herself!  This non-crafty momma was so impressed!

The kids got to play pool at a "family friendly" pub called Rapture for a YM/YWs activity.  It was pretty funny to see Craig very nervously asking parents if they were okay dropping their kids off at a bar for this, but no one seemed to object and the youth had a good time!

Bentley got this picture of Camille (I think during Pirate Night on the cruise?) and it's too horrifying funny.  My children and their duck faces!

We got home from our trip to find a box full of Hawaii swag from my parents!  Everyone was very excited!

(Kendra got sea turtle earrings)

I've been trying to make our mishmash of furniture in the basement work.  We've got WAY too many shades of brown happening here, but it's a basement, so does anyone actually care?  I feel like it's very cozy-- especially with the fireplace-- so hopefully that counts for a lot.  Craig is worried that the kids will go through the window, diving into the love sack.  It's a valid concern.  But I'm not sure where a better place for it might be...

(2-year-old not included)